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New Jokes Anyone?


hyebruin

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There were two friends, a white guy and a black guy. One evening, they were in a bar arguing over which of them could have sex the most times in one night. They decided to settle the issue by going to the local brothel for the evening.

So they got to the brothel, paired off with a couple of ladies, and went to their respective rooms.

 

The white guy energetically had sex with his escort and reaching up with a pencil, marked a line on the wall. Then he fell asleep. He woke up in a couple of hours and had sex again, albeit a little less enthusiastically. Again, he reached back and marked a line on the wall. And again, he fell asleep. He woke up again in a couple of hours and lethargically had sex again. He drowsily marked a third line on the wall and fell asleep for the rest of the night.

 

The next morning, the black guy barged into the white guy's room to see how he did. He took one look at the wall and exclaimed, "A hundred and eleven? Ah man!!! You beat me by three!"

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There were two friends, a white guy and a black guy. One evening, they were in a bar arguing over which of them could have sex the most times in one night. They decided to settle the issue by going to the local brothel for the evening.

So they got to the brothel, paired off with a couple of ladies, and went to their respective rooms.

 

The white guy energetically had sex with his escort and reaching up with a pencil, marked a line on the wall. Then he fell asleep. He woke up in a couple of hours and had sex again, albeit a little less enthusiastically. Again, he reached back and marked a line on the wall. And again, he fell asleep. He woke up again in a couple of hours and lethargically had sex again. He drowsily marked a third line on the wall and fell asleep for the rest of the night.

 

The next morning, the black guy barged into the white guy's room to see how he did. He took one look at the wall and exclaimed, "A hundred and eleven? Ah man!!! You beat me by three!"

And the winner is......

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Who is he?

 

After a long night of making love the young guy rolled over and was looking around when he noticed a framed picture of another man. The guy began to worry.

 

"Is this your husband?"

 

"No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him.

 

"Your boyfriend then?" he asked.

 

"No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear.

 

"Well, who is he then?" asked the bewildered guy.

 

The girl replied, "That's me before the surgery.

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Dare I believe this?

 

The reign of Henry VIII is marked with plagues, wars, upheavels, etc., and England's population drops to half. The king is aware of the danger this poses them, and he looks at the prisons to see that they are full of convicts and prostitutes. What he does is "breed" them to increase the population. This was called "Fornication Under the Control of the King." Take a look at the initials. :D This is where the word is said to originate from.

I got that in an e-mail. Thought it would be pretty #ahem# of whoever to make up something like that.

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Yes, that fornication business is certainly one of the theories behind the origin of the word but I think it's more of an urban myth. My dictionary for example says that the origin is unclear:

 

"Early 16th century. Origin uncertain: perhaps from a Scandinavian, source, in which case the underlying sense might be “to beat, bang.”

 

Encarta® World English Dictionary © & (P) 1999,2000 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved. Developed for Microsoft by Bloomsbury Publishing Plc.

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Yes, that fornication business is certainly one of the theories behind the origin of the word but I think it's more of an urban myth. My dictionary for example says that the origin is unclear:

 

"Early 16th century. Origin uncertain: perhaps from a Scandinavian, source, in which case the underlying sense might be “to beat, bang.”

 

Encarta® World English Dictionary © & (P) 1999,2000 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved. Developed for Microsoft by Bloomsbury Publishing Plc.

It cannot be any easier and clearer than the Armenian word "pornikoum". Yes it is derived from the Greek "pornos" like in pornography etc.

As to the P and F, this is a commonn pehnomenon, Ps become Fs and visa versa when reansliterated from one language to another. Many languages don'r have one or the other letter, Arabic does not have P, often a P will turn to F. Consider Fil-elepehant and Pigh. Incidentally the resason it is pigh in Armenian is because until the 14th c there was no F in Armenian. Consider "philosophy-pilisopa". It was adopted because King Hethum wanted to name his daughter Fimi.

Hence the Greek "pornos" become "forn" in English and in a roundabout way it becomes "pornik" in Armenian.

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Yes, that fornication business is certainly one of the theories behind the origin of the word but I think it's more of an urban myth. My dictionary for example says that the origin is unclear:

 

"Early 16th century. Origin uncertain: perhaps from a Scandinavian, source, in which case the underlying sense might be “to beat, bang.”

 

Encarta® World English Dictionary © & (P) 1999,2000 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved. Developed for Microsoft by Bloomsbury Publishing Plc.

Interesting to know. What word did they use before the 16th century?

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Interesting to know. What word did they use before the 16th century?

I don't think they did it before 16th century. But I could be wrong. Arfa, do you know? :P

They used "whoopie" :) Whoops!! Sorry!

They probably used "debauchery" or some other arvhaic term such as "having one's way" or "liberty". Remember "libertine". No, no I know, they used the biblical term "to know". Maybe! :unsure:

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I was right!

I just looked it up in thr Intelinear Translation of the Bible which juxtaposes the English pasrallel to the original Greek. In Galatians 5;19 the word "fornication" is juxtaposed to the Greek "porneo" ( the little Greek that I can read; pi, omicron, rho, nu, epsilon, I, alpha. :huh:

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adultery as "shnutyun".

wait wait wait ... how did they get from "adultery" to "shnutyun"? Wouldn't "darikavorutiun" or "chapahasakutiun" be more appropriate?

 

On second thought, this really explains the "shun shan-vorti" thing that people used to scream at me ... I thought it was an insult but I guess not ... they were just saying that I was an "adult" and also that I was the "child of an adult" :)

 

Wooooooo Hooooooooooo --- Learned something new again!!! :rolleyes: B)

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Seap, you SSO!!! Does that mean Chapahas-Chapahas-Ordi??

A Sunday school teacher had begun a series of cartoon drawings to illustrate the Ten Commandments. The first week, spanutyun mi @ner, it was a person attacking another with a dagger. The second, goghutyun mi @ner, showed a masked person entering a house. Everybody was waiting with bated breath to see what would happen the sventh week, shnutyun mi @ner. Finally the anticipation was rewarded. The cartoon was of a milk vender adding water to the milk.

What is that process called?

I am having an unadulterated fun. How about you? :P :P

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