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Armenian pie - A love story by the Forum members


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quote:
Originally posted by Aghtchik:
Once upon a time ...........

... there was a Turkish gal named Thorny.

and Armenian guy who was very horny.

Together they decided to bake a cake
because they couldn't think of anything else to make
But the cake got burnt, my oh my
so they agreed to try an Armenian pie

But then another problem arose....






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quote:
Originally posted by Aghtchik:


Harut, you are a little premature



sorry. it just rhymed.

sitting here in college library, all those girls passing by, smiling made me i don't know what.

[ September 06, 2001: Message edited by: Harut ]
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But then another problem arose....

Heck! There was no jelly!

So the guy picked his Armenian nose

and scratched his hairy belly

 

 

"HO, ho!!" screamed the Turkish gal called Rose

In MY kitchen no picking in an Armenian nose !!!!!!!

She gave him a napkin instead

shamefully looking at the nose that had turned red

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Once upon a time ...........

... there was a Turkish gal named Thorny.

 

and Armenian guy who was very horny.

 

Together they decided to bake a cake

because they couldn't think of anything else to make

But the cake got burnt, my oh my

so they agreed to try an Armenian pie

 

But then another problem arose....

 

 

But luckily they didn't get married, because a Turko-Armenian marriage wouldn't fare well on either side. After eating the Armenian pie, they both soon realized that they weren't meant for each other. Parting their seperate ways, Thorny met a nice Turkish man named Mustafa and the Armenian net a nice Armenian girl named Azniv. They both got married and lived long, fulfilling lives with many children.

 

They never spoke of the Armenian pie again.

 

The end.

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quote:
Originally posted by wh00t:
Once upon a time ...........
... there was a Turkish gal named Thorny.

and Armenian guy who was very horny.

Together they decided to bake a cake
because they couldn't think of anything else to make
But the cake got burnt, my oh my
so they agreed to try an Armenian pie

But then another problem arose....



But luckily they didn't get married, because a Turko-Armenian marriage wouldn't fare well on either side. After eating the Armenian pie, they both soon realized that they weren't meant for each other. Parting their seperate ways, Thorny met a nice Turkish man named Mustafa and the Armenian net a nice Armenian girl named Azniv. They both got married and lived long, fulfilling lives with many children.

They never spoke of the Armenian pie again.

The end.



Twoot, I reserve the right to with-hold my opinion of you...
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quote:
Originally posted by Aghtchik:
But then another problem arose....
Heck! There was no jelly!
So the guy picked his Armenian nose
and scratched his hairy belly


"HO, ho!!" screamed the Turkish gal called Rose
In MY kitchen no picking in an Armenian nose !!!!!!!
She gave him a napkin instead
shamefully looking at the nose that had turned red



No, no, no, that is ALL WRONG! Go back and start over!
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quote:
Originally posted by Thorny Rose:


No, no, no, that is ALL WRONG! Go back and start over!



If you think so, thorny Rose
Ok, tomorrow a different pose
this sleepy girl now needs a rest
before she can pass your difficult test

bari gisher, welterusten, good night
tomorrow we'll continue our todays fight
soon i will close both my left and right eye
and dream of the burning of the armenian pie
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Once upon a time,

There was a Turkish gal named Thorny

And an Armenian guy who was very horny (Harut)

Together they decided to bake a cake

because they couldn't think of anything else to make

(Liar…)

But the cake got burnt, my oh my

so they agreed to try an Armenian pie

But then a problem arose

Heck, there was no jelly!

“Oh, what is my grandmother going to eat??” exclaimed Thorny,

“If e’er there is no jelly to beat??”

Thorny’s mother interjected,

“Thorny, you, with your friend so horny,

Why don’t you take this pudding I have made for your crony?”

(This is Thorny’s paternal grandmother we are talking about.)

“And since it is autumn,” said Mommy,

“Why don’t you put on this red riding hoody?”

“OK, Mommy,” nodded Thorny.

“Now you are Little Thorny Riding Hood.”

And off the two went,

Hand in hand, skip skip skippy…

 

On the way to her granny’s house,

They came across a louse.

The louse asked Harut

If he could find him a place to stay put.

“I have a doggy,

Why don’t I take you to him?

He’ll put you up for the night.”

And so, hand in hand, Harut and the louse

Made a turn-about

And headed back to the house.

 

Li’l Thorny went off on her own,

And on the way, she saw

The Three Little Piggies!

Gamavor, Juggernaut, and Khodja!

“Hello, boys, did the Wolf pass this way?

I sure hope not, cos I'm going to me Granny!!”

Gamavor asked Thorny

Her eeny weeny, itsy bitsy li’l nationality.

“I am from Turkey!”

Gamavor flinched,

“Thorny whatever, I don’t talk to Turks.

Mommy and Daddy don’t allow me to. Sorry, I was drunk.”

He was building a straw hut.

Juggernaut eeked,

“You will not savage my knowledge

Of the whereabouts of the Wolf

To inrich yours.

Be backward and mongrel!”

He was building a wooden house.

And so Thorny turned to Khodja.

“With powerful adversaries as we have in our part of the world we can not afford any more diffusion of knowledge. We must loosen the litmus tests to be considered knowledgeable and/or wolf.”

He was building a mosque.

And so Little Thorny Riding Hood went on her way.

 

By and by, Thorny made it to her granny’s house…

Knock knock knock,

Toc toc toc.

A frail voice sounded,

“Who is the-e-e-ere?”

“Crony – er, ahem, I meanuh, Granny, it’s me!

Thorny!”

“Come in, my child,” said Granny from under covers and blankets.

“I hope the pudding is alright. And, while you are at it, please stop by poor Mrs. Brown next door – poor woman, so young but so ill – send this newspaper to her, I am done with it.”

 

Obedient, Thorny did as she was told,

And stopped by Mrs. Brown’s,

Knock knock knock –

“Come in!” and a

Just as Li’l Thorny had taken off her hood,

Some eeriness shrouded the house,

And a knock… knock… knock… sounded on the door.

did Thorny and Mrs. Brown.

“Wh-wh-wh-who is there??” muttered a meek Thorny.

“It is I – Wolf!”

did Thorny!

“What are you doing here?? What do you want?”

“I have come to eat yer Mrs. Brown!”

“I like older women.”

Thorny looked up.

“Pappy, is that you?”

The Wolf cleared his throat.

“You go girl! Er, ahem, hm. Pappy? What Pappy? Who’s Pappy?”

Thorny threw the door open

To see Winston in a Halloween costume –

A wolf!

“Pappy, come on in, I’ll leave you two alone.”

And she pushed Winston in

And shut the door behind her!

 

Just as she was going home,

The Witch of the Wastelands,

Queen of generalizing maniacs,

Armenian-wannabe Italian Aboush

Caught Thorny!

 

“turk Harem Harlot

Into the tower you go!” she hissed.

“And no pizzas for you

Until you tell us who you work for,

turk trained agent!

I’ll send you cat-food on my flying cane (not broom – T.R.)

Until then.”

 

“BWAAAAAAAAAAAAA!” cried Thorny.

“I miss my mommy and my daddy!

BWAAAAAAAAAAAA-A-A-A-A-A!”

 

“Ah, shaddup, turk!

You are now Thornyzel, HE!HE!HE!”

 

And Aboush flew away

On(!) her flying cane (appended to her derriere).

 

Poor little Thornyzel was left to her fate

Oh how dreadful it felt!

What would she do all those dreary hours

Without the internet?

 

Eventually, she heard some whooting

And looked out the window…

“Who is there?” She saw an owl on the top branch

Of a nearby willow.

“It is I – wh00t - why should Armenians give importance to what revisionist Turks think about our genocide?”

“Twoot, beat it out of here! You still haven’t told me how you are my superior and you are such a stupid human being – sorry, owl - that you can’t tell the difference between a revisionist and someone who is the brainwashed victim of one!”

“Afferim, janig.”

“Get lost, or I’ll twist yer neck 720 degrees, you cuckoo!”

“Not cuckoo, I’m an owl.”

And he got a Teflon pan thrown on his head,

After which he felt compelled to fly ahead.

 

Thornyzel, so without hope. Tsk tsk tsk.

Bah… Where’s that boyfriend when ya need him…?

So, instead of waiting for her hair to grow,

She tied together the strips of the bed-sheet

And climbed down, only to fall on the bushes below

For the last couple of meters or so…

Just as she was rubbing herself,

What did she see?

Oh my gosh!

MJ, with a white horse and shining armour,

With an American flag in the one hand!

“Yee haa! I mean, your loyal servant salutes you, fair lady.”

“Oh!” exclaimed Thorny. “Do you me save

From that disgusting, despicable Aboush the knave?!

Take me away, help me escape this nightmare!

And so she jumps on his horse,

Only to push poor little MJ off his saddle,

With a crash of colliding metal.

“MJ, you hurt?”

“O-O-O-O-OWw…

By in large, no.”

So, MJ gets back on his saddle and the horse is kicked into a mild trot.

And who are they to encounter? Boghos!

“MJ?? Here before me!! Where are you taking my fofinha?? And I thought you were a fellow Moderator of the Hye/High Table! I challenge you to a duel!”

Unexpectedly, Marquis pops up. “How dastardly!

How dare you plot schemes over my little strawberry?

Tally ho!”

“And me, and me!” Sherman (sdcheung) limps in… “I wanna be suitor, too.”

At that instant, Dragon (in the form of a dragon) stops by:

“Vartanoush, remember me? Susu?”

 

Just then, Winston passes by in his ‘Stang, with Mrs. Brown shouting out, “Yaaaaaay, I have been rejuvenated! Yeeee haaaaaaaaaaaaa!”

 

“Uh-oh,” Thorny thinks to herself, “this is the beginning of the end.”

 

END.

 

Twoot, I think this was a story much better (albeit proportionately sillier) than your rather dry one… ehehehe

It is certainly more realistic, though, ya know.

Thanks to all who contributed in the making up of this story. (((:

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quote:
Originally posted by Thorny Rose:

Eventually, she heard some whooting
And looked out the window…
“Who is there?” She saw an owl on the top branch
Of a nearby willow.
“It is I – wh00t - why should Armenians give importance to what revisionist Turks think about our genocide?”
“Twoot, beat it out of here! You still haven’t told me how you are my superior and you are such a stupid human being – sorry, owl - that you can’t tell the difference between a revisionist and someone who is the brainwashed victim of one!”
“Afferim, janig.”
“Get lost, or I’ll twist yer neck 720 degrees, you cuckoo!”
“Not cuckoo, I’m an owl.”
And he got a Teflon pan thrown on his head,
After which he felt compelled to fly ahead.



Sen salakmisin, Thorny oglum? Ne demek "stupid human being"? Why continue with the personal insults?
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quote:
Originally posted by wh00t:


Sen salakmisin, Thorny oglum? Ne demek "stupid human being"? Why continue with the personal insults?



Why continue with the personal insults? Have they even started?
You still haven't told me how it is that I am supposed to be your inferior. Ne o, sözünün eri değil misin?
Really, Twoot, so much better than yours, mine was... Yours was prejudiced, dry, and riff-raff...
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quote:
Originally posted by TigrannesIII:
ays himar e

all started by the girl with children out of wedlock...



Tarqmanoutioun khndrem.

Maybe my English isn't so good and certainly my Armenian, but I swear that I am not sure what you are trying to say here, TigrannesIIII, and who you are refering to.

[ September 09, 2001: Message edited by: Aghtchik ]
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