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Just Wondering....hypothetically Speaking


angel4hope

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how would you as an individual, without considering other peoples views, ...how would it be proper to tell someone you arent interested in them, when they ask you out (being of a different race) and you just are totally not interested...having nothing in common-as in ideologically...without hurting their feelings and without being fake....
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angel -- it depends on the person you're talking to, because you can't know what level of honesty/bluntness would offend them.

 

if you're not interested, you don't have to tell them why you're not interested (especially if it's due to racial differences). you just say "sorry, i'm not interested. but i'd love to be friends with you." that's what i'd do. you're not lying if you don't say why you're not interested, so you're definitely not being "fake." and if they ask you why you're not interested, you could begin by stating that you two have nothing in common...

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"I am sorry, although I am flattered, I have to decline"... or the last part could be more casual ... like "I can't".

 

They should get the hint there ... if the question comes as to "oh why girl ..."

 

Then the answer could me more along the lines of "I am very busy with school and have other priorities at this point" ...

 

and if they still keep going, then you increase your level of bluntness ...

 

and at some point you may have to say "Listen, there is NO WAY, ok?"

 

:)

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"I am sorry, although I am flattered, I have to decline"... or the last part could be more casual ... like "I can't".

 

They should get the hint there ... if the question comes as to "oh why girl ..."

 

Then the answer could me more along the lines of "I am very busy with school and have other priorities at this point" ...

 

and if they still keep going,

 

then you increase your level of blutness ...

 

and at some point you may have to say "Listen, there is NO WAY, ok?"

 

:)

I still consider the magic 8 ball answers to be better than yours.

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lol thats hilarious guys thanx....okie i was also thinking....i cant just use school as an excuse...because i go to school with the person...actually hes one of my discussion leaders... :o :unsure: :unsure: :( so go figure....and besides that...u never know what can happen...like if i do in the future have a boyfriend and were walkin around u know...and he sees..hes gonna know i wasnt being totally honest...oh god!!! i hate this craaaaaaaaaap!! seriously! y cant i be a guy?! im not ggod with these crappy things........the guys ure not interested in ask..the ones u are ...well their taken..lol hahaah
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and at some point you may have to say "Listen, there is NO WAY, ok?"

EEEEK!! No matter what, I don't recommend that sentence to anyone, having been hit with it once by a girl I liked.. (she said it as soon as I told her I was interested... I'm not that thickheaded as to insist after she said no..) :( I don't know... Bluntness is fine with me as long as it's not about yelling at someone or sounding like it anyway. It's not fun to be yelled at, especially if this is taking place around other people... :huh:

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actually hes one of my discussion leaders...

that could be problematic.. it could be counted as a conflict of interest. try to stay away from university faculty/staff as much as you can -- you don't wanna be subject to board hearings about discrimination or some such.

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"I am sorry, although I am flattered, I have to decline"... or the last part could be more casual ... like "I can't".

 

They should get the hint there ... if the question comes as to "oh why girl ..."

 

Then the answer could me more along the lines of "I am very busy with school and have other priorities at this point" ......

oh my. that is exactly what i say.

i also say, "i don't want a boyfriend right now."

 

....and at some point you may have to say "Listen, there is NO WAY, ok?"......
but i never say that
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lol thats hilarious guys thanx....okie i was also thinking....i cant just use school as an excuse...because i go to school with the person...actually hes one of my discussion leaders... :o :unsure: :unsure: :( so go figure....and besides that...u never know what can happen...like if i do in the future have a boyfriend and were walkin around u know...and he sees..hes gonna know i wasnt being totally honest...oh god!!! i hate this craaaaaaaaaap!! seriously! y cant i be a guy?! im not ggod with these crappy things........the guys ure not interested in ask..the ones u are ...well their taken..lol hahaah

You should tell him that he reminds you of the monster in your closet and that is why the relationship will never work out.

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lol thats hilarious guys thanx....okie i was also thinking....i cant just use school as an excuse...because i go to school with the person...actually hes one of my discussion leaders...  :o  :unsure:  :unsure:  :( so go figure....and besides that...u never know what can happen...like if i do in the future have a boyfriend and were walkin around u know...and he sees..hes gonna know i wasnt being totally honest...oh god!!! i hate this craaaaaaaaaap!! seriously! y cant i be a guy?! im not ggod with these crappy things........the guys ure not interested in ask..the ones u are ...well their taken..lol hahaah

well, if u can't say school...u can always say, "i got a lot of stuff going on/happening with me......so i can't."

i used that 1 too

;)

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Who cares? They're only men.

nairi jan, yeah, we're men, but sometimes it hurts, especially if you're in love (yes, there is something called love from a "distance" -- as long as you know a lot about the person, it's no longer a crush, it's more about love...) :(

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You are a great guy and will make some girl very happy, but I don't think we have much in common and while you may argue that differences attract they will also be the main factor that break the relationship. I speak from an experience and I don't want to subject myself to the repetition. And I would really like to maintain our relationship, but on a purely platonic level.

 

Build a strong and convincing case and he will have no choice but to agree.

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"I am sorry, although I am flattered, I have to decline"... or the last part could be more casual ... like "I can't".

 

They should get the hint there ... if the question comes as to "oh why girl ..."

 

Then the answer could me more along the lines of "I am very busy with school and have other priorities at this point" ...

 

and if they still keep going, then you increase your level of bluntness ...

 

and at some point you may have to say "Listen, there is NO WAY, ok?"

 

Ok Sip....own up.....how many times have you been told this? :)

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Better yet tell him that he reminds you of my avatar and how bug eyed it is.

haha ure hahahalarious!!actually your avatar doesnt scare me.... its kinda beginning to grow on me u know...it has this hypnotismic effect to it...i just dunno...lol :unsure: :unsure:

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the quickest way would be: "i'm looking to get married, so i take relationships very very VERY seriously!!!"----that will jumpstart them running like an olympic champion!!! :lol2: :lol2:

Agh.... hye bruin speaking from the heart.. HEHE....

 

 

Well, hmmm. angel, and this was only a picnic?

 

Just tell them what anileve said, it wont hurt there feelings, or if he sees you with another guy it wont matter..

 

anileve:

You are a great guy and will make some girl very happy, but I don't think we have much in common and while you may argue that differences attract they will also be the main factor that break the relationship.

 

Good one anileve..

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lol thats hilarious guys thanx....okie i was also thinking....i cant just use school as an excuse...because i go to school with the person...actually hes one of my discussion leaders...  :o  :unsure:  :unsure:  :( so go figure....and besides that...u never know what can happen...like if i do in the future have a boyfriend and were walkin around u know...and he sees..hes gonna know i wasnt being totally honest...oh god!!! i hate this craaaaaaaaaap!! seriously! y cant i be a guy?! im not ggod with these crappy things........the guys ure not interested in ask..the ones u are ...well their taken..lol hahaah

ooooh does that mean he's a t.a.??? i just find THAT sooo attractive!! just the fact that they're in a teaching role!! just makes you want them more!!! i've had a couple of cute t.a.'s..though you know the lust lasts only as long as "it's forbidden"...after the class is over....then things change a bit...and NO!!! i personally never dated any t.a.'s!!---they just were not THAT hot or normal! :P

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Blink at him and then all of a sudden say "kneres bayts angleren chem khosum. hajo, dasi g'gnumem" And never speak English to him again. Eventually he'll say, "Hey guess that cool looking foriegn chick doesn't speak English, at least I gave it shot."

 

That gets them most(but not all) of the time. :wink1:

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