vava Posted March 6, 2003 Report Share Posted March 6, 2003 I realise that American/Canadian relations have been a little strained lately - but in the spirit of John Candy, Mike Myers, Jim Carrey & other great Canadian comedians - humour is how we handle politics. I really do apologize to our American friends, and I do not mean any offence by the posting of the following: quote: Courtesy of Rick Mercer from This Hour Has 22 Minutes CBC Television: On behalf of Canadians everywhere I'd like to offer an apology to the United States of America. We haven't been getting along very well recently and for that, I am truly sorry. I'm sorry we called George Bush a moron. He is a moron but, it wasn't nice of us to point it out. If it's any consolation, the fact that he's a moron shouldn't reflect poorly on the people of America. After all it's not like you actually elected him. I'm sorry about our softwood lumber. Just because we have more trees than you doesn't give us the right to sell you lumber that's cheaper and better than your own. I'm sorry we beat you in Olympic hockey. In our defense I guess our excuse would be that our team was much, much, much, much better than yours. I'm sorry we burnt down your white house during the war of 1812. I notice you've rebuilt it! It's Very Nice. I'm sorry about your beer. I know we had nothing to do with your beer but, we Feel your Pain. I'm sorry about our waffling on Iraq. I mean, when you're going up against a crazed dictator, you wanna have your friends by your side. I realize it took more than two years before you guys pitched in against Hitler, but that was different. Everyone knew he had weapons. And finally on behalf of all Canadians, I'm sorry that we're constantly apologizing for things in a passive-aggressive way which is really a thinly veiled criticism. I sincerely hope that you're not upset over this. We've seen what you do to countries you get upset with. Thank you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raffi the Illuminator Posted March 7, 2003 Report Share Posted March 7, 2003 LOL VAVA!I just read this! This Hour Has 22 Minutes is one of my favourite shows! It's too bad that Rick Mercer is no longer on it Did you see his special on "Talking To Americans"? LOL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vava Posted March 8, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 No, I haven't seen it - Unfortunately I don't get a chance to watch the show much... (and I don't think many other people here found the above too funny! ) Oh well... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stormig Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 I thought it was funny, Vava. But not TOO funny. I personally enjoyed my Iranian lady more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fadi Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 Stormy repeat after me. "It was the best joke I have read" The next time you find Canadian jokes "not TOO funny" I'll depixelize you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 Stormy, Sip, will you guys help me fight these Canadians when they come after me? Yes. good. Here is a funny Canadian joke my friend. --- An Ontarian wanted to become a Newfie (ie. a Newfoundlander.) He went to the neurosurgeon and asked, Is there anything you can do to me that would make me into a Newfie?". "Sure it's easy." replied the neurosurgeon. "All I have to do is cut out 1/3 of your brain, and you'll be a Newfie." The Ontarian was very pleased, and immediately underwent the operation. However, the neurosurgeon's knife slipped, and instead of cutting 1/3 of the patient's brain, the surgeon accidentally cut out 2/3 of the patient's brain. He was terribly remorseful, and waited impatiently beside the patient's bed as the patient recovered from the anesthetic. As soon as the patient was conscious, the neurosurgeon said to him "I'm terribly sorry,but there was a ghastly accident. Instead of cutting out 1/3 of your brain, I accidently cut out 2/3 of your brain." The patient replied "Qu'est-ce que vous avez dit, monsieur?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fadi Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 Azat you should check twice your notes. That was the patients answer. "Oh, say can you see, by the dawn's early light, What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming? Whose broad stripes and bright stars, through the perilous fight, O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming? And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air, Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there. O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave? On the shore, dimly seen through the mists of the deep, Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes, What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep, As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses? Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam, In full glory reflected now shines on the stream: 'Tis the star-spangled banner! O long may it wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave. And where is that band who so vauntingly swore That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion A home and a country should leave us no more? Their blood has wiped out their foul footstep's pollution. No refuge could save the hireling and slave From the terror of flight, or the gloom of the grave: And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave. Oh! thus be it ever, when freemen shall stand Between their loved homes and the war's desolation! Blest with victory and peace, may the heaven-rescued land Praise the Power that hath made and preserved us a nation. Then conquer we must, when our cause it is just, And this be our motto: "In God is our trust." And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave! " [ March 08, 2003, 11:33 AM: Message edited by: Domino ] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 HEHEHE. I knew you would come back with something like that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stormig Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 LOLOLOLOL Domino, that was great. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stormig Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 Azat, I'll help with anything you ask. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Fadi Posted March 8, 2003 Report Share Posted March 8, 2003 I knew you would knew I would come back with something like that Azat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 9, 2003 Report Share Posted March 9, 2003 quote:Originally posted by Stormy:LOLOLOLOL Domino, that was great. Stormy jan, I think my joke was much funnier then what Domino said... And thanks for your support in defending me. Some defense that was, you jumped right over to the Canadians side. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stormig Posted March 10, 2003 Report Share Posted March 10, 2003 quote:Originally posted by Azat: quote:Originally posted by Stormy:LOLOLOLOL Domino, that was great. Stormy jan, I think my joke was much funnier then what Domino said... And thanks for your support in defending me. Some defense that was, you jumped right over to the Canadians side. Do not be fooled by the way things appear, Azat jan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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