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Nothing New To Say But Still...


Armat

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at 42 years old I find life becoming even more meaningless.Endless rat race,always trying to catch up and no end in sight.I find myself hardly believeing in anything.Religion?Think whatever you want but for me its a nice fairy tale.God? What God? I can't even express myself the void.No I don't need to discover "God" or anything spiritual in it but still part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

This is a low point in my life.No denying it...

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at 42 years old I find life becoming even more meaningless.Endless rat race,always trying to catch up and no end in sight.I find myself hardly believeing in anything.Religion?Think whatever you want but for me its a nice fairy tale.God? What God? I can't even express myself the void.No I don't need to discover "God" or anything spiritual in it but still part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

This is a low point in my life.No denying it...

 

You are at the void state, being jealous of the simpleton who live happy in his/her simple life without having to question anything. Yeap, familar. It will change, you are the doubt kind, always doubting and wanting answers, and at times, just void. :) But you know what answers others have is not important, what is important is what answers you find. I have few new stuff to propose you, my theories have changed a lot since the last time. The differences is that I can not tell them in public anymore, but we can discuss them in private, knowing you I know you will adore them. Who said that a god is important to find sense to life?

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at 42 years old I find life becoming even more meaningless.Endless rat race,always trying to catch up and no end in sight.I find myself hardly believeing in anything.Religion?Think whatever you want but for me its a nice fairy tale.God? What God? I can't even express myself the void.No I don't need to discover "God" or anything spiritual in it but still part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

This is a low point in my life.No denying it...

Armat.

Good to see you again.

We love you and we love what you do best.

Why this sad face?

At forty something it is too early for you to go through midlife crisis, menopause (I mean men-o-pause).

Will you forget all that mythology of religion and God that was inculcated in your head during your formative years!!??

Genghis Khan was dying. He summoned his wise men and ordered them to write him an “history of mankind”.

One wise man wrote a thousand page treatise.

NO!

Another wrote a hundred page.

NO!!

Yet another wrote a ten page.

NO!

The Khan did not have enough time to read them.

A lowly servant wrote this-

“Man was born, he suffered and died”.

VOILA!!

We are all born of dust. In the interim we may wear some muscle and bone, and at the end we all turn back to dust. In the interim, between the ages of zero to 90 we enjoy our muscle and bone and live to the fullest. Just make sure that, after you turn to dust you leave behind other muscle and bones to perpetuate LIFE.

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I too lost religion in my so far short life,but all of a sudden something came in me and now I feel a closeness to God that I have never felt before.Although I am 17 years old and telling you this I kind of sort of know what you are talking about, but I can not put myself in your exact position seeing that I am just a teenager and you a grown up.
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at 42 years old I find life becoming even more meaningless.Endless rat race,always trying to catch up and no end in sight.I find myself hardly believeing in anything.Religion?Think whatever you want but for me its a nice fairy tale.God? What God? I can't even express myself the void.No I don't need to discover "God" or anything spiritual in it but still part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

This is a low point in my life.No denying it...

 

 

 

welcome to midlife crisis bro, we all go true it, look at Arpa, he is still in it :) , mine is half way there and soon Azat will join us.

 

what you need is time away from everything for at list 2 weeks, look at me, thats my smut nowdays

Take care bro, i love you

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People turn to religion when they need it, and oftentimes the need is to feel like they're a part of something greater than they are. There are lots of ways to get there, though. For many people (including a great number of Armenians), having an ethnic identity adds meaning to their lives because it makes them a part of a society that's greater than the sum of all its members.

 

If you have that--and if you're on this forum, doesn't that add meaning to your life?

 

It doesn't even need to be that; it could be any identity that you'll have for many years to come.

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at 42 years old I find life becoming even more meaningless.Endless rat race,always trying to catch up and no end in sight.I find myself hardly believeing in anything.Religion?Think whatever you want but for me its a nice fairy tale.God? What God? I can't even express myself the void.No I don't need to discover "God" or anything spiritual in it but still part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

This is a low point in my life.No denying it...

 

thanks for sharing your private honest thoughts with us. I'm curious to find out what my outlook will be if I get to 40s.

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For many people (including a great number of Armenians), having an ethnic identity adds meaning to their lives because it makes them a part of a society that's greater than the sum of all its members.

If you have that--and if you're on this forum, doesn't that add meaning to your life?

 

Ethnicity as a social club. :D

 

Trouble is, Armenian ethnicity is rather like an exclusive golfing club, with the main preoccupation of its members being not actually playing golf, but working out ways of excluding potentual new members, expelling other members for not being pure-bred golfers, and looking down ones noses at those fellow members who do not wear the designated clothing, or use the correct putters, or act like the clubhouse rules say a proper golfer should act.

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at 42 years old I find life becoming even more meaningless.Endless rat race,always trying to catch up and no end in sight.I find myself hardly believeing in anything.Religion?Think whatever you want but for me its a nice fairy tale.God? What God? I can't even express myself the void.No I don't need to discover "God" or anything spiritual in it but still part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

This is a low point in my life.No denying it...

Wow, I never thought you'd be the one to write such post!

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part of me is jelous of people who can simply pray and believe without questions.

... speaking of that... today, my mom was astonished to discover that a co-worker younger than her was a very, seriously religious. Her co-worker had held a lent for a long time, lost a big amount of body weight, but was happy that she'd cleansed her body from some of her demons! And I always thought that that co-worker was such a sweet lady, always smiling pleasantly and intelligent looking. Who knew!

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Ethnicity as a social club. :D

 

Trouble is, Armenian ethnicity is rather like an exclusive golfing club, with the main preoccupation of its members being not actually playing golf, but working out ways of excluding potentual new members, expelling other members for not being pure-bred golfers, and looking down ones noses at those fellow members who do not wear the designated clothing, or use the correct putters, or act like the clubhouse rules say a proper golfer should act.

 

 

I agree! That was just one example. :) That's why you need to join other clubs, too. I'm also trying to join the club of Angelenos (geographic club), and have just joined the club of those who work in the criminal law field (professional club). These two, combined with being of a certain ethnicity, are sufficient to make most of us content. Happiness is a different matter.

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I am sorry that I am late responding to this post. Worked lot of doubles lately.

To be honest I am feeling too many things to even understand this void but I know it also relates to financial situation and luck of quality time to do what I love.

 

 

QueBecer

“but we can discuss them in private, knowing you I know you will adore them”

Sure I am open to interesting ideas.

Thanks for response.

 

Arpa

Thanks for warm welcome. Didn’t expect from you.

“Man was born, he suffered and died”.

VOILA!!

Perhaps this knowledge contributes to the void? Something is missing here.

Sako*****

Great that you feel what you feel. I hope you keep it up.

 

Ed

It is funny that I just remembered walking your ass off in NY. Boy that was lot of fun running around in minus degree weather being a tourist.

Perhaps we all appreciate things after the act…

 

SanVal

I do have a huge need to visit Armenia. It may change lot of things.

 

Armjan

Maybe what I am feeling is universal but most things are related to Money and where you are at my age.

 

Asoldier

Who said people pray and believe without questions?

I think most religions are dogmatic and that’s exactly what they teach-total compliance to their laws or you wont get to enter heaven or Fk 40 virgins etc.

Neko

I didn’t renew my site and got tired of it, I like to rebuilt with new works.

Sip

Love that about painting but believe me after working 50-60 hr a week hardly helps having energy left for that but you are right though.

 

Anoushik

I am human and perhaps depressed now. I am listening lot of Khachaturian specially his violin and piano concertos now. It is very interesting that him alone I understand better then ever and identify with. What a powerhouse of a composer. Very underrated in Classic music colture but people who really understand music his works are dynamic, thoughtful, lyrical and melancholy like our history however his piano concertos have such dynamic hope that is amazing. Love Khachaturian.Forgive me of sidetracking the subject but I know you love music.

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Hi Armat; a little late, but better late than never.

 

I agree with Anoushik about your nice avatar.

 

Armat jan; I am a Christian and though I feel from what you're saying about the emptiness; but that's exactly why I have turned to God more so. I have also felt many times out of sorts and I still do every now and then, we all do. But prayers with belief and reading from the Bible and finding the truth from from it helped me. I am also a very artistic person and I appreciate the arts and culture, to have some common grounds with you; but I also find great many answers and fulfillments in God's words.

 

That's all I have to say really. It's up to you to take the path you want to take; but one day if you want to try something new and suddenly decide to pick up a Bible and read from it, you'll understand where I'm coming from.

 

Also with one of our members that doesn't post any more in here; I think you know him, Sassun believed in Buddhism as well.

 

I hope you'll find the truth whatever that may be for you sometime soon. :)

Edited by Anahid Takouhi
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Hi Armat; a little late, but better late than never.

 

I agree with Anoushik about your nice avatar.

 

Armat jan; I am a Christian and though I feel from what you're saying about the emptiness; but that's exactly why I have turned to God more so. I have also felt many times out of sorts and I still do every now and then, we all do. But prayers with belief and reading from the Bible and finding the truth from from it helped me. I am also a very artistic person and I appreciate the arts and culture, to have some common grounds with you; but I also find great many answers and fulfillments in God's words.

 

That's all I have to say really. It's up to you to take the path you want to take; but one day if you want to try something new and suddenly decide to pick up a Bible and read from it, you'll understand where I'm coming from.

 

Also with one of our members that doesn't post any more in here; I think you know him, Sassun believed in Buddhism as well.

 

I hope you'll find the truth whatever that may be for you sometime soon. :)

Thanks for the Avatar just a random image ;)

I am glad it works for you(reading the Bible) but I can't even turn 1 page before total boredom sets in. :D

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Hi Armat, (I wonder if you are the same from the Topix forums). I empathize with your feelings. I am not far behind your age. I work to work and to support my family. Seems all I do is work and have no time for anything that is truly important. All the while it feels like time is running out. The naive energy and wonder of youth is slipping through my fingers. It is a rat race none of us can win. It is just a chace to get to the next point without knowing what it is I am even after anymore. What point is there in the unknown regardless of what it is when the hear and now is so elusive at times. If you find any answers, don't hold back, I know I could use a crutch.

 

good luck

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Hi Armat, (I wonder if you are the same from the Topix forums). I empathize with your feelings. I am not far behind your age. I work to work and to support my family. Seems all I do is work and have no time for anything that is truly important. All the while it feels like time is running out. The naive energy and wonder of youth is slipping through my fingers. It is a rat race none of us can win. It is just a chace to get to the next point without knowing what it is I am even after anymore. What point is there in the unknown regardless of what it is when the hear and now is so elusive at times. If you find any answers, don't hold back, I know I could use a crutch.

 

good luck

Hi GMD

I posted few weeks there only becouse I was curious about Turkish people and their attitudes but as you well know the discussion revolves around denying AG and an Armenian end up defending it so endless cycle.There is noone there worth wasting time with.About life...I hear you.I guess American lifestyle takes a toll on ones inner life.I seriously may end up living in Armenia at some point.Bad or good at least it will be my country.

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I am human and perhaps depressed now. I am listening lot of Khachaturian specially his violin and piano concertos now. It is very interesting that him alone I understand better then ever and identify with. What a powerhouse of a composer. Very underrated in Classic music colture but people who really understand music his works are dynamic, thoughtful, lyrical and melancholy like our history however his piano concertos have such dynamic hope that is amazing. Love Khachaturian.Forgive me of sidetracking the subject but I know you love music.

Dear Armat, I've missed your posts on Hyeforum. Maybe because the old gang of you, Sasun, Domino, Eve, Edward, etc. are not around so much anymore, or have stopped posting altogether, visiting the forum is not the same anymore. I think we used to have many meaningful discussions (and some silly ones too, I admit!).

 

Your comment about Khachaturian's music prompted me to listen to one of his works - "Nocturne" from Masquerade. It's gorgeous.

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Hi GMD

I posted few weeks there only becouse I was curious about Turkish people and their attitudes but as you well know the discussion revolves around denying AG and an Armenian end up defending it so endless cycle.There is noone there worth wasting time with.About life...I hear you.I guess American lifestyle takes a toll on ones inner life.I seriously may end up living in Armenia at some point.Bad or good at least it will be my country.

 

I have not been back to Armenia since before independence. I am planning a trip this year, hopefuly summer. It has been too long. I miss my relatives and I need to see my homeland. I am sure I have a romanticized view of the homeland. Despite all that I read about corruption etc, I still want to believe the best about our people. I'll have to see for myself.

 

Good luck enker, no matter what, remember life is a journey and an adventure. It is the same old thing that gets us down.

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