as i see it - Pt. IV

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, June 30, 2005

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There is a familiar type of Armenian who wouldn’t dare to tell a bus driver how to drive a bus, or an insurance salesman how to sell insurance, or a dog-catcher how to catch dogs, but who feels fully qualified to tell a writer what to write, not because he has had a radically different set of experiences but because he has been brainwashed to believe he is smart and that he is so far ahead of you that even if he is wrong he knows better.

*

I speak from experience. I too was brainwashed to believe I was so far ahead of the competition that no matter how fast they ran, they would never catch up with me. It took me many years to think not as a loud-mouth, self-righteous Armenian dupe but as a born-again human being whose knowledge and understanding were limited, whose assertions contained uncertainties, and whose infallibility was a figment of his own febrile imagination.

*

I know now that repeating what I was told as a child does not qualify as thinking, to learn consists in unlearning all the nonsense I was taught as a child, and there is no merit in emphasizing the positive and covering up or ignoring the negative.

*

I know now that the only way to understand myself and others is to face facts as they are and not as I would like them to be, and the only way to do that is by being honest and objective even if I am forced to reach conclusions that may be painful to my vanity.

*

To those of my readers who have had an Armenian education, I ask: Do you know the Armenian words for honest and objective? Do they exist? And if they do, when was the last time you heard them spoken by any one of our bosses, bishops, benefactors and their flunkies and dupes?

#

[ara baliozian]

#

Saturday, July 02, 2005

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THE LESSONS OF HISTORY

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When it comes to trusting either politicians or men who dedicate themselves to selfless intellectual labor, mankind has exhibited a

pronounced predilection to choose politicians.

*

Greeks in the 5th Century BC trusted the judgment of their politicians and condemned Socrates to death as if he were a criminal guilty of a

capital offense. More recently, when Germans had a choice between Goethe and Goebbels, they chose Goebbels.

*

Man calls himself homo sapiens, behaves like an asinus ignoramus, and sees neither inconsistency nor contradiction.

*

When Socrates exposed the ignorance of his contemporaries he was accused of negativism by his executioners, who by killing him saw

themselves as respectable, law-abiding citizens making a positive

contribution to the community.

*

When the Nazis went about their murderous task of exterminating the Jews, they too believed they were making a positive contribution to mankind.

*

That's the way it is with politicians. Before they start murdering innocent people, they brainwash themselves and their dupes into

believing they are doing mankind a favor.

#

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, July 03, 2005

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Philippa Scott in a recent issue of the SPECTATOR: “For centuries in the Caucasus women sang to their daughters: ‘Live among diamonds and splendor as the wife of the Sultan.’” I remember when a couple of years ago I paraphrased the lyrics of this lullaby, one of my gentle readers called me “son of a Turkish whore!”

*

To brag is to lie. Chauvinism is a symptom of inferiority, and I don’t mean inferiority complex or feelings of inadequacy but moral decay.

*

The question I am beginning to ask myself is: What if so far all I have done is flatter our vanity if only by implying that we are not yet beyond reason? What if by suggesting that we may still hope I have done nothing but recycle nationalist propaganda, that is to say, the very thing whose evil I have been trying to expose?

*

Whenever a friend wants to make me feel better, he tells me “the pen is mightier than the sword,” or “at the beginning was the word.” I know now that the dollar is mightier than the pen, and at the beginning may have been the word because neither the sword had been forged nor the dollar minted. What if literature is a waste of time, poets are no better than birds serenading the moon, and thinkers nothing but mental masturbators?

#

[ara baliozian]

Monday, July 04, 2005

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REASON AND INSTINCT

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What separates us from animals is reason, not instinct. Animals have instinct too, and they may even have a far more developed and refined version of it that allows them to foresee earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, and tsunamis.

*

To follow the dictates of instinct (or gut feelings) means to ignore the voice of reason, which also means to behave in an unreasonable manner.

*

Where reason tries to understand, instinct arouses fear and hatred, among other emotions; and emotions, according to Sartre, “are attempts to change the world by quasi-magical means.”

*

War and massacre, and violence in general, are extensions of instinct as surely as fear and hatred. Whenever instinct is not modified by reason the result is bound to be personal tragedy or collective catastrophe.

*

To say “I have a gut feeling” might as well be synonymous with “I am probably wrong.”

*

When our revolutionaries rose against the Turks at the turn of the last century they followed their gut feelings. When the Turks reacted by trying to exterminate us, they committed the same blunder. And if we hate the Turks today it’s because we allow our gut to silence our reason.

*

Please note that I am not preaching love (I leave that to our dime-a-dozen sermonizers) but understanding.

*

When a fanatic contradicts a man of reason, it only means that he has succumbed to the dictates of his gut at the expense of his brain. And when a fanatic convinces himself that he has reason on his side, it only means that he is driven to do so not by reason but by instinct.

*

Fanatics do not reason, they rationalize, and to rationalize means “to make something irrational appear rational or reasonable.”

#

[ara baliozian]

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

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AXIOMS AND COROLLARIES

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If your enemy is united and you are divided, even if you are the mightiest empire on earth, you are destined to be defeated by the weakest of nations.

*

To assert that we were divided on account of our geography is to imply that we were not masters of our mountains and valleys but their slaves. Which also means that we allowed unthinking factors to shape our thinking and, by extension, our destiny.

*

Once upon a time we were subservient to mountains and valleys. Then we became subservient to Romans, Persians, Byzantine Greeks, Arabs, Turks, and Russians. Subservience has become second nature with us. So much so that even when we live in free democracies we continue to be subservient to our bosses, bishops, benefactors, and their hirelings. Which also means that we are not just slaves but slaves of former slaves.

*

We behave like slaves of former slaves when we allow our present masters to brainwash us into believing that we continue to be dependent on Turks and their goodwill, when we say the only way for an Armenian to achieve closure or inner balance is acknowledgment of the Genocide. What we really mean by inner balance, I suspect, is freedom, which raises the question: When was the last time we were truly free? Were we ever free under the Ottomans or the Soviets, two of the most tyrannical systems in the history of mankind?

*

We may be the slaves of former slaves but we are past masters in one field – that of the blame game. We ascribe all our blunders, miscalculations, and misfortunes on others. If it’s not the bloodthirsty disposition of Asiatic barbarians it is the morally degenerate West.

*

As for being the first nation to convert to Christianity, allow me to quote Hegel: “The Christian frees himself from the human Master only to be enslaved by the divine Master…”

Not that we ever went as far as freeing ourselves from human masters…

*

Writes Hagop Garabents (1925-1996): “Once upon a time we fought and shed our blood for freedom. Now we are afraid of free speech.” Censorship is a convenient tool for people who refuse to face reality.

*

We silence dissenters in the same way that our former masters silenced us. Because a slave’s role models are not other free men but his masters, and according to Hegel once more, “Everything that the Slave does is an activity of the Master.”

*

It is true that we only silence our dissenters, we don’t cut out their tongues, Ottoman style, not because we are more civilized than our former masters but because cutting out tongues is against the law. But the result is the same.

#

[ara baliozian]

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

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Our organizations outnumber our population, and yet we remain the least organized of nations -- with the probable exception of Kurds and Gypsies. This is known as the "many chiefs and no Indians" syndrome.

*

It is impossible to agree on solutions with someone who rejects the existence of problems.

*

I am not against God and capital (make it Capital and god), or, for that matter, religions and ideologies in general, but I do have second thoughts about what's being done in their name.

*

Anonymity is a mask and sometimes a mask reveals more than it hides.

*

Do I hate my fellow Armenians? I am not sure. I hate all liars and manipulators regardless of race, color, and creed, and if some Armenians lie and manipulate I do not see why I should love them.

*

We cannot face today's reality with yesterday's illusions.

*

Rock singers today think they can end poverty in Africa with money. Others think money will only prop up corrupt regimes. Who is right? I am not sure. But I am sure of one thing: there is no wisdom in money--but try to explain that to the wealthy.

*

What if an exposed Big Lie is immediately replaced with two or even twenty-two little lies?

#

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, July 07, 2005

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SHISH-KEBABING A SACRED COW

*********************************************

In an essay titled "William Saroyan's Unchained Ego," Brooke Allen writes: "Saroyan was self-destructive on an epic scale, a monster of narcissism who let his outsize ego blight and finally devour his life."

*

Further down: "Saroyan wrote blistering escoriations of phoniness [but] he had very little to offer in place of phoniness except for an idealized innocence that is sometimes pretty phony in its own right."

*

Allen further quotes from the memoirs of Saroyan's wife, Carol Matthau: "Because he had gone on record on loving humanity, he didn't have to be nice to the people in his life." Comments Allen: "'Didn't have to be nice' is a wild understatement. Saroyan was a world-class, king-sized, copper-bottomed Shit with a capital S."

*

I quote these lines from Allen's essay because they epitomize some of our collective failings, among them our chauvinism (or narcissism), our divisions and fragmentation promoted and legitimized by our ego-driven bosses, bishops, and benefactors (self destructive urges), and finally, our addiction to clichés, slogans, double-talk, and propaganda (i.e. phoniness).

*

As I see it, our choice is between believing our own positive assessment of ourselves or considering the merits of the testimony of more objective and impartial witnesses no matter how negative or hostile.

*

For more on Saroyan, see ARTISTIC LICENSE: THREE CENTURIES OF GOOD WRITING AND BAD BEHAVIOR by Brooke Allen (Chicago, 2004).

#

[phantom22]

Willie did not only abuse his wife but his children as well. His daughter died of alcoholism at a young age, which broke her mother's heart-she died soon after. Only his son was able to ward off the the evils of his father. Willie gave us a bad name in some circles. He may have been a great writer, but he created numerous difficulties for the Armenian cause.

[ara baliozian]

Friday, July 08, 2005

**********************************

BOOK REVIEW

********************

INDEPENDENCE ARMY: STORIES. By Vahe Avetyan. 294 pages. (Stockholm, 2005). (In Armenian).

***************************************************

In this collection of anecdotes, encounters, dialogues, reflections, comments, autobiographical fragments, and poems, Vahe tells it like it is. If you don’t like blunt talk, this book is not for you.

*

“Show me an intellectual who praises political leaders and I will show a BROWN-NOSER,” he writes.

*

“I am not a writer,” he declares at one point. Yet, he writes with the spontaneity of a volcanic eruption.

*

“My teacher of political science once told me, ‘Vahe, remember that politics is not necessarily prostitution. It becomes one only when whores engage in it.’”

*

“I don’t remember a single lesson about loving mankind, but about loving one’s country, as many as you like. And it is in the name of this love that we were taught to hate.”

*

On the prospects of the Armenian diaspora: when asked about it, an activist friend in Buenos Aires replies: “If we start thinking about our prospects, we will stop acting.

*

“On rereading what I have written, I am astonished at my own genius, but I am also willing to concede that in a few years, when I reread these lines, I shall have to admit that I am no better than a jackass.”

*

On one level this is an intensely Armenian book, but on another it is also anti-Armenian -- or rather the anti-Ottomanized and anti-Sovietized version of Armenianism.

*

If I were to summarize Vahe’s central message, it would be: You have to die as an Armenian to be reborn as a human being, and only after you are reborn as a human being, may you hope to be a good Armenian. Or: “To renounce your self you must first have a self.”

*

As long as we have writers like Vahe Avetyan among us, we may think about our prospects with renewed hope.

*

P.S. After reading Vahe’s book, I started reading Umberto Eco’s ON LITERATURE (New York, 2004), in which I came across the following paragraph: “If one maintained that all myths, all revelations in every religion, were nothing but lies, then, since belief in gods, of whatever kind, has shaped human history, we could only conclude that we have been living for millennia under the rule of falsehood.”

*

If to “belief in gods” one were to add all kinds of ideologies, from nationalism and communism to many other isms (with the possible exception of alcoholism), one could divide writers into two broad categories: those who justify and perpetuate falsehoods and those who expose and ridicule them. Vahe belongs to the second category, for which reason he deserves our admiration and gratitude.

#

[ara baliozian]

Saturday, July 09, 2005

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HISTORIANS: A DIALOGUE

******************************************

QUESTION: If you needed the services of, say, a lawyer, an architect, or a doctor, would you choose a professional or an amateur?

ANSWER: I would choose a professional, of course!

Q: Between a layman's version of the past and a historian's, whose version would you trust more?

A: I would trust the historian's.

Q: Why?

A: Because, unlike a layman, a historian has spent a lifetime studying the past and he knows and understands more than any layman.

Q: If you trust a historian more and a layman less, does that mean you trust all historians more?

A: In relation to all laymen, yes.

Q: As an Armenian, and on the subject of our genocide, would you trust a Turkish historian more than an Armenian layman?

A: No, I wouldn't.

Q: Why not?

A: Because I know better and i have read Armenian historians.

Q: Even though you are a layman and the Turk a professor of history?

A: Yes.

Q: Then, would you agree with me when I say that some laymen or amateurs are more trustworthy than some professionals?

A: On some subjects, yes.

Q: So that even when a historian knows much more than a layman, his lack of honesty and objectivity may make his knowledge worthless?

A: It would appear so, yes.

Q: And when it comes to history, honesty and objectivity are far more important criteria than acquaintance with facts and documents?

A: Again, it would appear so, yes.

Q: Nothing further.

#

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, July 10, 2005

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THE SWAN SONG OF A JACKASS

******************************************

That’s the tentative title of my memoirs, if I ever write one. Swan song because it will probably be my last book, and jackass because only a jackass would write for Armenians.

*

When a self-appointed Armenian pundit – that is to say, the average Armenian reader -- assumes he knows and understands more, he will also assume you know and understand less. That is why his arguments are nothing but disguised insults.

*

Writing for Armenians is a waste of time. Even an Armenian with a single-digit IQ assumes he is smarter and knows better than all our writers (past, present, and future) put together.

*

I have met many self-assessed smart Armenian who are no better than damn fools, and there is a very simple explanation for that. Only damn fools believe in their own assessment of themselves.

*

When one thousand people agree on a lie, it is no longer a lie but state-sanctioned and legitimized propaganda.

*

We may fool ourselves with our rhetoric and propaganda, but the first thing an outsider does is detect and discard both.

*

A brainwashed person is as subservient as a slave, even when he thinks he is free. His thoughts and actions are not his but those of his masters, even when he thinks he has none.

*

An honestly written meaningful line is like music; it can comfort, excite, astonish, and thrill. But in the same way that even the most beautiful music has no effect on the tone deaf, good writing has no effect on philistines and phonies. Hence, their contempt for writers and literature in general.

*

At a time when I thought political commitment was a good thing in a writer, because without it he would be condemned to write about such frivolous subjects as “the mutual torments of love” (Sartre), I was told by one of our elder statesmen: “In our environment, literature and politics are mutually exclusive concepts.” I know now that what he meant was partisan politics, and our partisans today are more interested in the past than in the present and future, because they have more blunders to cover up and more scores to settle than Sicilian famiglias.

#

[sen_Vahan]

Ara,

 

Can you understand Vahe's writings very well? Do you know the Armenian/Russian slang used sometimes?

[ara baliozian]

Monday, July 11, 2005

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Sometimes conventional wisdom is no better than collective insanity.

*

In America even philomoronism is thought of as a school of philosophy. What a country!

*

You cannot reason with someone who believes God Almighty is on his side.

*

Literature is incompatible with big business, religion, and ideology. In other words, where bosses, bishops, and benefactors enter, literature exits, or rather, it is given the bum’s rush. Writers know this. Law-abiding citizens couldn’t care less.

*

There is something fundamentally wrong in an environment where adults think like children and where children are taught to contradict their elders.

*

Patriotism preaches love but practices hatred.

*

Don’t raise your voice to stress the validity of an argument. Loudmouth eloquence is an oxymoron.

#

[ara baliozian]

about Vahe's Armenian:

 

i found some of it difficult to understand or even guess. but on the whole, and on rereading, i did better..../ara

Edited July 11, 2005 by ara baliozian

[ara baliozian]

Tuesday, July 12, 2005

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DIARY

**************

Woke up this morning with the overture of Mozart’s “Magic Flute,” and remembered his unforgettable quote, “I write music with the same ease that a pig piddles.” And I thought of our pundits who also write with the same ease but what they produce is no better than a pig’s piddling. As they say in polite society, forgive my French; and as they say in Washington, if you don’t like blunt talk stay away from the kitchen.

*

The Jews are fond of saying that whenever the goyim want to solve their problems, they start killing Jews…and we start silencing writers. The defenseless make the best scapegoats.

*

Political parties that are mistakes don’t make mistakes.

*

People who have nothing to brag about brag about nothing.

*

Under Hitler the Gestapo knew better, and under Stalin the KGB. When the men at the top are hoodlums, hoodlums will assume to know better.

*

We are bad talkers and worse walkers.

*

You may have noticed that some of our academics write as if Armenian history began with the massacres and ended with Turkish denial.

*

Political leaders try to recreate the nation in their own image, and whenever the nation cooperates disaster is bound to follow.

*

Devil’s advocates I can deal with, but devils, that’s different.

*

Serial killers, rapists, and child molesters: they are not mankind but a fraction of it. Likewise, perpetrators of massacres are not the nation but a fraction of it. To hate a nation makes as much sense as to hate mankind.

#

[sen_Vahan]

Ara,

 

I saw your post on bnagir.am , sent a note, but now I do not see your post anymore. Do they delete posts over there or I am missing something?

 

vahan

[ara baliozian]

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

*************************************

The first thing fascists do when they assume power is to systematically exterminate intellectuals -- remember Talaat and Stalin. And when they can't kill, they silence; and when they can't silence, they trash.

*

"How dare you criticize bishops?" an angry reader once demanded to know. "Even if they are bad men, they are still men of God!"

*

"Our benefactors have been rebuilding the Homeland," another gentle reader points out. "What the hell have you been doing?"

*

I remember a neighbor in the ghetto, a survivor and a dedicated member of the Party, speaking of a fellow Armenian who came to a bad end: "He wasn't all there, you see. He actually criticized the Party. Imagine that if you can. Criticizing the Party! Unheard of [chelesvads pan]! You can't criticize the Party!"

*

An old friend of the family: "On your own, you can do nothing. As a member of the Party - that's different!" Translation: As an honest writer you are bound to starve. As a brown-noser, you may go places. Or, in the words of Carol Matthau, Saroyan's ex-wife, in her memoirs: "There is a saying in Armenian: 'When I say la, you must understand lalabloo."

*

You want to survive as an Armenian? Learn to say "Yes, sir!" We all know what happened to us when we stopped saying "Yes, sir!" to the Sultan. Learn from history! Be subservient!

*

One of our partisan flunkeys who is also an imam of genocide recently dismissed my work as "philosophical gobbledygook."

*

An uncle twice or thrice removed and a retired cab driver in his eighties: "How much do they pay you for each article you publish in the papers? Nothing? Has it ever occurred to you that they pay you nothing because what you write is worth nothing?" I am grateful to this uncle. It was from him and his kind that I learned the art of blunt talk.

*

Perhaps I am on the wrong path. I should learn to say these things with some degree of detachment, irony, and style. But then, why should I give a damn when no one else does? Bishops speak in the name of god, benefactors in the name of Capital, and bosses in the name of power, the mob, and the imperative of history. What do writers to? They deal in verbal manure and what they say can't be worth a fly's fart.

#

[ara baliozian]

frankly, i don't know what they do.

but if you read me here you don't have to read me in bnagir. ara

 

 

Ara,

 

I saw your post on bnagir.am , sent a note, but now I do not see your post anymore. Do they delete posts over there or I am missing something?

 

vahan

style_images/master/snapback.png

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, July 14, 2005

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In our environment those who can’t understand the present predict the future.

*

Unhappy is the nation whose prophets mouth the slogans of charlatans.

*

Ours is a democracy modified by corruption, incompetence, and assassination.

*

Our charlatans tell us it may take anywhere from 15 years to two generations (half a century) for things to improve. That’s because, they explain, it is not easy to de-Ottomanize and de-Stalinize a nation.

*

But Armenians are smart, enterprising, and adaptable. To survive they emigrate. They emigrate even to Siberia and Turkey where they hope to get a better deal. And our “betters” encourage emigration because they know if the number of the unemployed and destitute goes up, so will general discontent which may lead to riots and, inevitably, to embarrassing headlines in the international press.

*

The solution, according to our charlatans, patience -- a euphemism for subservience, namely, that which our Ottoman and Soviet masters taught us.

*

Our charlatans expect us to believe that our “betters” know better. What they don’t tell us is that our “betters” may well be our worst.

*

What if patience and subservience in our case mean passive acceptance of corruption, thievery, abuses of power, prostitution, and crime in high places? No matter. We are expected to believe that our men at the top know their business. Yes, maybe. But what if their business is taking care of number one and emasculating the nation?

*

Our charlatans tell us our bosses, bishops, and benefactors know better because they speak in the name of god and Capital, and when god and Capital speak, scribblers should shut up and listen; and if they don’t, they should be silenced, that is to say, they should have their tongues cut out, Ottoman style.

[phantom22]

Ara,

 

The odar press will pay you. You are a good writer who sees things as they are.

 

The Armenian community is so traumatized by the Genocide that they see any true discussion as treason. This serves those who run things very well, as they can silence critics on the spot.

 

I learned years ago that unless you toe the traditional line, the Armenian elders will starve you. You would do better to rely on odars to recognize your talents. 60 some years old is still young. You have at least another 20 years left. Make the best of it. Stop wasting your time with the Armenian press. It is similar to the American press at present. It is controlled by the interests of the wealthy and powerful. There is really only one North American Armenian written media operator that shows any impartiality.

Edited July 15, 2005 by phantom22

[ara baliozian]

Friday, July 15, 2005

*************************************

THE IRRESISTIBLE CHARM OF CAPITAL.

RICHELIEU AND PROUST.

CRIME AND PUNISHMENT.

************************************************

Capitalists think money is a blessing from God. Their hirelings have no wish to bite the hand that lays the golden egg; and their brown-nosers live with the hope of some day being the beneficiaries of their largess.

*

Richelieu: “If you give me six lines written by the most honest man, I will find something in them to hang him.”

Marcel Proust: “People know more about us than we think.”

So you thought you could hide your true face behind a mask?

*

Though in its brief span of existence on earth homo sapiens has invented ten thousand gods, men of faith continue to believe that their god is the only true god. There is nothing wrong with the idea of god, of course. What is wrong is the mental paralysis it seems to induce in some men. This paralysis may be said to be the source of all fanaticism and evil. I am afraid Turks and our massacres have a similar effect on our genocide imams.

*

Every sin, crime, or aberration carries hidden within it its own punishment. Mental paralysis is a fanatic’s punishment.

#.

[ara baliozian]

There is really only one North American Armenian written media operator that shows any impartiality.

style_images/master/snapback.png

 

please, name him! / ara

[phantom22]

The publication of Edward Boghosian, who occasionally publish short portions of your writings.

[ara baliozian]

Saturday, July 16, 2005

***********************************

Freedom of speech is a writer's most valuable possession. Take it away from him and you might as well cut out his tongue.

*

Our literature is a cemetery of silenced voices. To our publishers and editors I ask: When was the last time you published an editorial in defense of free speech? If you don't defend free speech, who will? And even more to the point, can you de-Ottomanize or de-Stalinize a community by adopting Ottoman and Stalinist methods?

*

I have heard a number of Armenians say, "I can't write freely about Turks because I have relatives in Turkey," but I have never heard of an Armenian in Turkey who suffered on account of what someone said in Australia, America, or Brazil.

*

Even Jewish writers who wouldn't dream of denying the Holocaust are willing to concede that "the Holocaust has been exploited and even distorted." (See Christopher Hitchens, LOVE, POVERTY, AND WAR: JOURNEYS AND ESSAYS, page 262). Don't expect such an admission from our genocide imams - they are not mature enough, or objective enough, or honest enough.

*

There are decent Armenians as there are decent Turks, Kurds, Gypsies, Arabs, and Zulus. All my efforts are concentrated on making honesty and decency more acceptable in our environment.

*

When a deceiver speaks of tolerance, he means tolerance of deception, and he can always count on the support of his dupes.

*

If it weren't for religion, Napoleon once remarked, the poor would butcher the rich. That's where our bishops come in. Our benefactors build churches and our bishops anoint them Princes of Cilicia, Kings of Armenia, and Emperors of Transcaucasia.

#

[ara baliozian]

to survive, eddie must rely on ads from bosses, bishops, and benefactors (my 3 mortal enemies)...and i can see why his preference would be for them. / ara

 

 

 

The publication of Edward Boghosian, who occasionally publish short portions of your writings.

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