Azat Posted August 9, 2004 Report Share Posted August 9, 2004 Reading a thread in the language section(http://hyeforum.com/index.php?showtopic=9578) made me think about the definition of a friend from not the linguistics stand point but rather what a friend is. I have to say I only have 5-6 friends. And 3 of them are Armenian and 3 are “Americans”(Chinese, German/Scottish and Irish). The bond that I have with Armenian friends is very different. I know every single one of them will be next to me in time of need, I know I can count on all of them, and I know they will do anything and everything for me. However my Armenian friends will not only do those things for me but for my extended family and friends as well. A friend of mine is a friend of theirs. And out of respect for me they will do everything for them that they would do for me. I don’t know I am finding it hard to explain, but I know clearly in my head what the differences are. Let me give you a different example. When I was visiting Armenian 3 years ago for the first time. My cousins friends treated me so incredible that I was overwhelmed. I could not imagine any of my “odar” fiends doing the same for my cousins if they were to visit the states. They came to the airport to pick me up at 3AM, they changed their whole life/schedule/work(and one of them runs a big shop and is very critical to his business) to make sure that I enjoyed all of my 8-9 days that I had in Armenia. They did all this without expecting anything in return. Nothing… I know that my Armenian friends will do some of that as well for my cousin or another friend, but I just can’t imagine one of my “odar” friends doing the same. Don’t know. Maybe I am wrong. Also I meet lots of people who introduce their “friends” to me. I have asked a few “Well this friend… How many times have you talked together in the last year” Or “How close a friends are you” And it seems to me that in the States everyone calls people that they meet as “friends” but to me “friendship” is much deeper and bigger thing. Anyways, I talk to much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arpa Posted August 9, 2004 Report Share Posted August 9, 2004 (edited) That is the hallmark of a homogeneous society, sepecially of a society that has been oppressed for so long. Contrast that to this. The saddest story of modern times, when a whole heterogeneous neighborhood stood by and dared not intervene. It makes me cry every time The tragic story of Kitty Genovese. http://www.newsday.com/extras/lihistory/8/hs818a.htm Would you not intervene, even risk your life if Kitty was your daughter, sister or even the daughter/sister of your "FRIEND"?? Edited August 10, 2004 by Arpa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sasun Posted August 10, 2004 Report Share Posted August 10, 2004 Very true Azat, I get the impression that friendship in the US often means $. When I visited Armenia the last time I felt guilty on several occasions when I realized how I have unconsciously become like and American "friend" behaving a particular way not acceptable by Armenian friendship standards. That's the disadvantage of living in an area where there are not many Armenians around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harut Posted November 11, 2004 Report Share Posted November 11, 2004 here is a thing to think about.... as i look back through the time and even now, most if not all of my friends were/are totally different in their thoughts and actions from me. i can't make friends who are like me. why? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nané Posted November 12, 2004 Report Share Posted November 12, 2004 here is a thing to think about.... as i look back through the time and even now, most if not all of my friends were/are totally different in their thoughts and actions from me. i can't make friends who are like me. why? style_images/master/snapback.png that goes for most of us, i think. we already have someone like us, "our own self" ... therefor we look for someone different from us. how borring would it be if someone agreed with everything you said? as far as the topic goes, i totally agree with Azat. i have felt exactly the same way during my visits to Armenia. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Romo Posted November 24, 2004 Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 Harut, What you said is so true. Its very hard to make and specially keep friends in US. Most people get carried away with all opportunities here and become very materialistic. There is the pressure of having the best of everything, the most expensive cars amongs the friends and so forth. Everyone is under pressure of driving that nice car to show off that its just so stupid. People will go over their head and not to mention up to their ears in debt just to fell long they belong or to fit in. Anyway, good friends are hard to find/keep. I've gone through many different group of friends, and out of all I have may be kept 3-4. Some groups can't have fun until there's alocohol involved and so on. Chem uzum glukh tzavatznem, you guys get the point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dianjan Posted November 24, 2004 Report Share Posted November 24, 2004 that goes for most of us, i think. we already have someone like us, "our own self" ... therefor we look for someone different from us. how borring would it be if someone agreed with everything you said? as far as the topic goes, i totally agree with Azat. i have felt exactly the same way during my visits to Armenia. style_images/master/snapback.png I agree with all of the posts. I live in US, and unfortunately I have more non-Armenian friends then Armenian friends. No matter how close I am with my best friend (who isn't Armenian), I still sence that difference between us that I can't explain. I act, and behave differently from her. And my Armenian friends and I have different family values and values in general. I am sure that you all understand what I'm talking about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
koko Posted November 30, 2004 Report Share Posted November 30, 2004 (edited) here is a thing to think about.... as i look back through the time and even now, most if not all of my friends were/are totally different in their thoughts and actions from me. i can't make friends who are like me. why? style_images/master/snapback.png Thoughts and actions...well no one can be exacly like YOU or even have the same opinions about everything thati s teh same as you have. And of course, to be with someone who obeys your every command, or cant make up his own mind, or be independent is mostly a very boring person. Edited November 30, 2004 by koko Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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