angel4hope Posted February 8, 2004 Report Share Posted February 8, 2004 And your cry baby whiny assed opinion would be.....? Do I look like a ***ing people person? This isn't an office, it's hell with fluorescent lighting. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left. I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me. Sarcasm is just one of the services we offer. If I throw a stick will you leave?? YOU!.... Off my planet! If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet I'll put shoes on my cats. Does your train of thought have a caboose? The bible was written by the same people who said the earth was flat. Did the aliens forget to remove your anal probe? Errors have been made, others will be blamed. Ohhh, let me turn on the part of my brain that gives a damn. A hard on doesn't count as personal growth. Whatever look you were going for, you missed. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up . See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil. Are these your eyeballs, I found them in my cleavage. I'm not your type, I'm not inflatable. I have a computer, a vibrator and pizza delivery. Why should I leave the house? Not all men are annoying, some are dead. Did I mention that kick in the groin you'll be receiving if you touch me? It's not the size that coun... no wait, it's the size! A woman's favorite position is CEO I'm trying to imagine you with a personality. A cubicle is just a padded cell without the door. Stress is when you wake up screaming and realize you haven't fallen asleep yet. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay checks. Okay, Okay, I take it back! Un*** you! Too many freaks not enough circuses. Macho law prohibits me from admitting I'm wrong. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it? Chaos, panic, disorder - my work here is done. I plead contemporary insanity. And which dwarf are you? How do I set the laser printer to stun? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel4hope Posted February 8, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2004 DATING: The process of spending enormous amounts of money, time, and energy to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the present and will learn to like a lot less in the future. EASY: A term used to describe a woman who has the morals of a man. EYE CONTACT: A method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many women have difficulty looking a man directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located in her chest. FRIEND: A member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing. INDIFFERENCE: A woman's feeling towards a man,usually interpreted by the man as "playing hard to get." IRRITATING HABIT: What the endearing little qualities that initially attract two people to each other turn into after a few months together. NYMPHOMANIAC: A man's term for a woman who wants to do it more often than he does. SOBER: A condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love. ATTRACTION: The act of associating horniness with a particular person. LOVE AT 1st SIGHT: What occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet. LAW OF RELATIVITY: How attractive a given person appears to be is directly proportionate to how unattractive your date is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel4hope Posted February 8, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2004 This is his world, we just live in it. A man who worked for the fire department came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the firehouse. Bell #1 rings, and we all put our jackets on. Bell #2 rings, and we all slide down the pole. Bell #3 rings, and we are on the truck and ready to go!" "So," he continues, "From now on, we're going to run this house the same way. When I say Bell #1, I want you to strip naked. When I say Bell #2, I want you to jump into bed and when I say Bell #3, we're going to make love all night!" The wife is agreeable with this arrangement. The next night, he came home from work and yelled, "Bell #1!" The wife took off all her clothes. "Bell #2!".....The wife jumped into bed. "Bell #3!"..... They began passionate loving... After two minutes, the wife yelled, "Bell #4!"..... The husband asked "What the hell is this Bell #4?" "MORE HOSE!" she replied, "YOU'RE NOWHERE NEAR THE FIRE!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hyebruin Posted February 8, 2004 Report Share Posted February 8, 2004 you're a cool girl angel jan now that's my kind of sarcasm! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel4hope Posted February 8, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 8, 2004 thanx bruin jan so are you! hehe i got more of these 4 yah... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anonymouse Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 You've got more faces than an oven full of gingerbread men. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel4hope Posted February 9, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 is that a sarcastic remark or a joke in addition to the thread... lol haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anonymouse Posted February 9, 2004 Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 Both. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
angel4hope Posted February 9, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 9, 2004 hmmm i thought so....lol you should be renamed mr. sarcasm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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