Moving to learn

[Armine]

I would like to know what the general understanding is about an Armenian girl who moves away from home in order to go to school. Each individual precieves this issue in a different manner based on where they live and who they are raised by. I would like to know people's opinions on this matter if is it attainable... Thank You very much.

[Pilafhead]

Do some traditional families see that as bad? How could it be? Go for it! Everyone needs to be independent for some period of time. Plus you'll meet all kinds of new people.

 

Mike

[Aaron]

Armo

My answer depends on wether you are a girl (pretty one) or a guy so i could prepare the appropriate answer.

Just kidding

What a question, if the girl or anyone else has to move out for studies than so be it, we're living in the 21 st century and moving from place to place (specially for academic reasons) is very justified and also in style.

 

I really like this icon.

[Armine]

Thank you very much for your responses... I had been thinking about this issue for some time...what i needed was reassurement and i got it... once again, Thank you.

[Gayane]

I'm a little late in answering, but here's my take on it:

 

 

go...go....go as far as you can....lol

 

i didn't when i had the chance, and it's one of the few things i've ever regretted in my life...

 

you will find your growth stunted (or at least severely repressed) if you stay...

 

so go already!

[Armine]

lol.. thank you Gayane Jan

I'm so amazed as to how you are so sure of your answer. I guess that just shows that you did regret staying.

[Pilafhead]

Armo,

 

Because of family finances, I just lived at home and commuted to school. I totally regret missing the experience of going away, living in the dorms, meeting different people and all that. Do it!

 

Mike

[THOTH]

Agree with all of the above comments. At some point in your life you (most likely) will move out from under your parents sway and discover who you are as an adult. This is a most rewarding, enlightening and necessary step for developing and finding yourself. I think there can be no better time to do this then in college - for once yyou get into the working world (or married life etc) you will get involved into day demands and have less oppurtunity to meet wide ranges of people, expirement with what you like (and who you are) and such. College life is fun and interesting and is a very very special experience.

 

I had such (though lived off campus) - but like some of the others who commented - not nearly far enough from my folks. (which is why immediatly after I graduated I switched coasts entirely!). Go for it I say - you will have no regrets (just remember to keep disciplined enough to do your studies...)

[Azat]

Armo,

 

I am in the same boat as Gayane and Mike and I stayed at home durring my school days. If I could do it all over I would have gone far far far away. If you can afford it, it is the best thing you can do for your self.

 

Azat

[Armine]

I would think so because at that point you feel it on you own skin, right MJ Jan? I just hope the mistakes I will make, which I'm sure will take place are not 3-layered skin deep, if you know what I mean. The good thing is I know that I will get through what ever comes my way no matter how much I have to suffer, I wanna live my dreams.

 

~~~Armine

[MJ]

My best wishes to you on your way.

[Armine]

Thank you

[Armine]

I am fortunate enough to have my financial problems resovled due to scholarships i have recieved. The only difficulty I have is being away from home. I will be dorming because the drive from my house to Irvine is about an hour and 15min without traffic, thus I cannot commute there.

 

Thank you guys so much for taking the time to respond, my father always tells me to learn from others' mistakes, thanks for the advice. Now I am sure it will be a rewarding experience. Thoth, I will definately keep all you said in mind .

 

~~~Armine

[MJ]

Dear Armine,

How about learning from others' success?

[Armine]

MJ Jan,

My father says that as well...and I follow his advice... In order for me to be successful in life I need to learn from others' and their experiences, whether it be good or bad.

 

~~~Armine

[MosJan]

images/smiles/converted/smile.gif

[MJ]

OK... You seem to be fully equipped to go out into the wilderness.

[Armine]

... a smile for you MosJan Jan Jan Jan ...

[Armine]

LOL...Thank you MJ Jan ...I certainly hope so ~~~

 

~~~Armine

[MJ]

Good luck. But don't be affraid to make a couple of mistakes of your own. You learn from your own mistakes more than from others' mistakes.

[dragon]

Armo=Armig?

 

Barsgahay or I'm mistaken...

[Armine]

Dragon Jan

I was born and raised in Yerevan, which makes me Hayastantsi.

 

Sireli Thoth,

I completely understand how vital personal growth is in ones life... and i would jump at the opportunity to travel, or even go abroad to study. The only problem is I think I am a little too young and unexperienced to go off alone; at the same time I am afraid that I am emotionally not ready. I am only 17 years old and still in the transition stage from high school to university. While I was at at summer program at UCI about a month I realized how homesick I could get. Maybe after my freshman year I'll get used to it. The funny thing is I have been away for periods of time, for instance I went on a class trip to Armenia this year but I was not completely isolated; that was for a limited time. I think I need to gain a little more experience before I persue such things. My family is not really prepared for it and it is difficult for me as well. The good thing is I am open for the opportunity and sometimes I like being, not a hermit forsay, but time just to figure things out for myself, who I am, and what I want in life (everyday activities don't allow me to do so). Thank you for your suggestions, I will keep them in mind.

 

~~~Armine

 

P.S. By the way where exactly do you go to school and what is you field of study?

[THOTH]

Well Armo/Armine -

 

First of all - so you don't get the wrong idea about who I am - I am an old (?) married guy. I like to reminiss about my younger days though - and your posts have made me think on my past a bit....

 

You seem like you have a very good head on your shoulders and I think that you will do fine in your life. (and sure - take your time to work things out for yourself - but don't forget you are only young once...enjoy it while it lasts) I understand you being young and that you might get homesick - so perhaps Irvine is just right for you now. You will grow alot over the course of this next year and I think you will become much more independent and able to operate farther from home for longer periods. And it will do both you and your parents good (though being Armenian parents they will never stop worrying...never ever...). And I understand their concerns - they watch the news & stuff and its not Armenia and such...But that of course is part of the problem (they will hold you very tight) - and it makes things more difficult for Armenian kids (to become their own person) - the general conservative (and often negative) nature of Armenian parents (perhaps not all - but most I think). Sure there are good things to this (being conservative and very very concerned about you) - I appreciate that - and you likely have a very solid, supportive base to fall back on - one that should instill confidence in you and be a platform for you to take some chances without fear of failure.

 

One of my main regrets is that I didn't goof off more in my youth. Really. I always was working 1 or 2 jobs - taking massive amounts of credits - work work work - doing what was expected of me...etc I wish i would have taken some time off to backpack around the world or such - or spend some (more) time at our various national parks and just bum around - see places meet new people etc. So don't be afraid to trake a braeak - maybe right in the middle of your school program. And don't just rush into your major. As you take some time off and see the world a bit - talk to folks - find out what they do - etc - then you can decide what you may want to do with your life. There is plenty of time for study and work - don't be in such a rush all of the time (to just do school and work). (Did I mention how Armenians just love to give advice...LOL)? I wish you well.

 

I was a Political Anthropology major from the University of Maryland BTW. (a long time ago...before you were born...LOL...I'm sure I'm almost your parents age [but still rock!] My eldest son is closer in age to you than you are to me by a factor of 2...).

 

I moved to LA (East Hollywood...Normandie Ave...under the observatory) after I graduated - I was 21 - and the only people I knew in California were my ex girlfriend and her brother. (so basically I was alone) I wasn't homesick at all really - it was great - I was totally free - though I remember at first being desperate to make some friends - and in particuar meet some girls! And I did - it all worked out OK. I had 5 great years of fun in LA - in some way it was like the teenage/school years I never had (though I sort of did...really). I travelled (a lot) - went out around town, went to the beach, mountains, desert...etc etc had a great time. Now I am back on the East coast, married, with kids...but still having fun! (just no freedom anymore..LOL

[Armine]

Thoth

I couldn't agree with you more!

 

Irvine is a good place for me now.

 

Being independent is a major issue for me. It is what I strive for. I know that the only person I can rely on is myself. I don't want my parents and brothers supporting me when I am old enough to do it myself. I know it's their responsibility but its just not right. How long are they supposed to take care of me and pamper me?... there is always a limit to things; I don't want to take advantage of them (they should take their money, go on a vacation and enjoy life, trust me they have worked enough). My dad wants me to be independent as well so that I can take care of myself as I grow older, no matter what situation I am put in. In order to do so I have to do many of the things you mentioned in you post. I will try my best to balance out my studies and other activities. I will cease every opportunity I get to travel and have fun, but I will remain focused on my studies (as far as my major goes, there are many things i want to do and am interested in, but I am highly motivated to study the Armenian Genocide in graduate school; I want to double major now, in psyhc and history so that I can have a variety of things to choose from). I do feel bad that you did not have so much fun due to your overload of work, that is one thing I will beware of, I want to enjoy my university life (not hate it).

 

What you said about Armenian parents is what I respect about them most. I don't mind when my parents get edgy about things because I know they love me and all they want is the best for me (just like most parents). I don't blame them at all; by now we have learned how to communicate with one another (they understand me perfectly, well just about).

 

As for being old.. trust me you are not. My oldest brother is about your age and my dad is more than 3 times my age. You stil have your whole life ahead of you. Age is not a factor, it's all in the mind.

 

Its really cool that you got to travel a lot, it is something I want to do. As for loosing your freedom (I'm sure you were j/k),lol, I don't see it that way,it's more like beginning a new life and enjoying the other facets of having another type of freedom.

 

I was wondering what you ended up doing after your graduation from college. What is your occupation.. what does that major lead to?

 

~~~Armine

[THOTH]

quote:

---

Originally posted by Armo:
I am fortunate enough to have my financial problems resovled due to scholarships i have recieved. The only difficulty I have is being away from home. I will be dorming because the drive from my house to Irvine is about an hour and 15min without traffic, thus I cannot commute there.

Thank you guys so much for taking the time to respond, my father always tells me to learn from others' mistakes, thanks for the advice. Now I am sure it will be a rewarding experience. Thoth, I will definately keep all you said in mind .

~~~Armine

---

No problem. I know how domineering Armenian parents can be (do you think 1hr15 is far enough?) I understand that Irvine is a great (technical) school. (and I am envious because some of my favorite S Cal beaches [that I miss] are down that way). Don't be afraid to pursue oppurtuity or travel in general that will take you even farther afield. While you'll likely meet new people in Irvine - I suspect that they will be much like those around where you now live (and being so close to home you will likely still "hang" there & with some of your current friends etc). I can't stress more how important it is for your growth to get really out there and away from one's element and meeting people much different then yourself - even if for limited periods. After a year or so you may want to think of taking a semester or so overseas or at some more distant school or such...or doing somthing next summer that takes you farther away for a bit -either for learning, work or just for fun! Just suggestions. Enjoy!