as i see it - Pt. III

[ara baliozian]

You must be the only armenian then, who is not assimilated

or am I wrong here?

I believe that a recognition of the genocide will make it easier to remain and stay armenian!!

You think not?

Most of us are sad not because the deaths of so many armenians , but because of the injustice that is put upon our shoulders, with turkey, as well as other countries like USA, not aknowleading the genocide. With the reocognization of the genocide it would be like a weight lifted from our shoulders.. that is one of many postitive results it will bring if Turkey would recognize the genocide.

i refuse to be dependent on the turks.

at the turn of the century we were at their mercy.

you are implying: we continue to be.

every fiber in my body tells me that's WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!

no, i am not assimilated. But i am alienated by your kind of thinking....

[ara baliozian]

NOTES / COMMENTS

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We are misunderstood as well as understood on someone else's terms, never our own. So that there is some degree of misunderstanding even in understanding.

*

It is astonishing the number of justifications, explanations and theories one can come up with if one chooses to ignore the facts, which amounts to saying: if you choose to move in your own realm of fantasy and imagination.

*

Propaganda is not literature and to propagandize is not to think but to recycle someone else's ideas, or rather, misconceptions and prejudices.

*

To those who say Iraqis, or Arabs in general, or even Armenians are not yet ready for democracy because it is an alien concept to their culture, I say: A culture, any culture, that does not recognize the fundamental human rights of all its citizens cannot consider itself civilized. Such a culture is no better than barbarism that will think nothing of implementing a policy of indiscriminate massacre to solve its internal problems. It is true that Armenians, unlike Iraqis and Turks, have not yet engaged in ethnic cleansing, but they have allowed the exodus of over a million of their own countrymen as if it were an inevitable fact of life imposed on them by force majeure. And consider the victims of the Earthquake. It is true, earthquakes are acts of God, but buildings are not. And earthquakes don't kill people, buildings do. The question we should ask ourselves is: What right do we have to call ourselves a civilized and progressive nation when we think of corruption, incompetence, and the death of thousands not as our responsibility but as results of historic forces beyond our control?

*

Not all our revolutionaries were heroes but all our victims were martyrs. It has been our sad destiny to produce more martyrs than heroes.

*

It is a waste of time criticizing our political parties. When it comes to criticizing one another, they do a far better job than any objective non-partisan observer.

*

If I were a member of a party, I would say it is the best party even if it were the worst. If I were employed by one of our organizations, I would say it is the least corrupt even if it were run by the Corleones. Which is why I see more merit in being a slum-dwelling unemployed and unemployable misfit than in being the hireling of one of our bosses, bishops or benefactors.

*

After attending a lecture on present-day conditions in Armenia and its corrupt leadership, a fellow Armenian approaches me and makes the following comment: "Armenian leaders have always been corrupt and indifferent to the fate of their subjects. Nothing new in that."

*

When on the wrong side of an argument, an Armenian is unbeatable.

*

A man who cannot admit error cannot accept his humanity.

*

To hate means creating a devil who on closer inspection

may be only a reflection.

*

We can't solve our problems as long as we think of them as entities that exist outside as opposed to within.

*

One of the advantages of being an Armenian writer is that no one overestimates you. On the contrary, they go out of their way to underestimate and even insult you; they even reduce you to dust and like dust you have no choice but to rise.

*

If you use your common sense and common decency you can't stray too far from the path. You would think that to be good advice. Well, yes, it is, provided you keep in mind that common sense is the least common faculty in the world and common decency flies out the window when self-interest enters.

*

It has been said that empires behave like gangsters and oppressed nations like pimps: yes, but pimps whose secret ambition is to be gangsters.

*

I once met an Armenian lawyer from Istanbul who berated me for my lack of patriotism but he did so in Turkish.

*

In a market economy and an environment controlled by business, where even the Vatican has investments in contraceptives, I consider being unmarketable one of the cardinal virtues.

*

[ara baliozian]

NOTES AND COMMENTS (March 11, 2004)

************************************************

About God and theology in general, my two favorite quotations are:

"Man cannot create a worm but he has created ten thousand gods."

And:

"Anyone can speak in the name of God, and millions have, but who can act with His wisdom?"

*

Critics are sometimes accused of exposing our dirty linen to the world at large; but if they didn't, who would benefit? The wolves or the sheep?

*

"If Armenians are as bad as you think they are," I am told once in a while, "how do you explain the existence of so many odar Armenophiles?"

For every Armenophile, I could name two Turcophiles. What would that prove? That Turks are wonderful folk worthy of universal affection?

*

Hegel says somewhere that when words are not followed by action they become empty verbiage and meaningless noise. A great thought. An admirable observation. Wonderful advice. Except for one thing: it was adopted by fascists.

*

Friday, March 12, 2004

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In our environment, when money whispers, even the stone deaf hear and obey.

*

Fascists silence writers because they know in the realm of ideas they are destined to lose. Censorship is an admission of defeat.

*

When a democratically elected leader commits a blunder, his successors correct it; but when a tyrant makes a blunder he builds more monuments, palaces, and underground bunkers.

*

I was visiting a friend when I heard eerie screams from the upstairs apartment.

"Someone being tortured to death?" I wanted to know.

"Newlyweds" my friend replied.

Same occurrence, two diametrically opposed interpretations. It's the same in politics.

*

It has been said that not reading books is worse than burning them.

*

I will never understand our fear of dissent. Dissenters mean no harm and they have harmed no one. They have often been killed but they have killed no one.

*

You can't reason with fanatics. Zohrab tried it with Talaat and we all know what happened to him. We also know what happened to Talaat. Which may suggest that fanaticism is not always a guarantee for a long and happy life.

*

United States of America could also be called United Races, Colors, and Creeds of the World. America represents the world and mankind as a whole more than any other nation on earth. To hate America is to hate mankind.

 

Saturday, March 13, 2004

********************************

Being right can be a risky business if one does not take care in choosing the right time and place, not to say style and context. History provides us with many instances that illustrate this point. Consider the fates of Socrates, Jesus, and our own revolutionaries at the turn of the century.

*

When the lunatics run the asylum, being sane can be dangerous.

*

I will never be a popular writer among readers who cannot discriminate thinking for themselves from recycling someone else's propaganda.

*

During the controversy surrounding Darwin's theory of evolution, an English clergyman insulted a scientist

by calling his ancestors apes, to which the scientist replied:

"Better an honest ape than an ignoramus and a charlatan like you."

*

All cultures have their Dark Ages. Ours is at its apex today.

*

All leaders assume they are smarter than the people

until they are thrown out of office, assassinated, or beheaded.

*

In his memoirs, Yervant Odian uses the word "hairenapaghtsoutiun" (nostalgia or longing for the homeland) not in reference to

Armenia but to the Ottoman Empire

and more particularly Istanbul.

He mentions the case of an Armenian writer in Alexandria

whose longing became so irresistible that

he returned to Istanbul where we was warned

he would be arrested and jailed,

and he was arrested and jailed.

*

Our failings are human failings; so are our problems. All human problems have human solutions. To assert uniqueness in order to underline the unique complexities of our problems has the double demerit of being dishonest and cowardly. Cowardly because it is a symptom of fear: fear of facing facts, and fear of confronting reality.

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, March 14, 2004

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If you live in a dream world, prepare yourself to wake up in a nightmare.

*

The greatest asset of a pundit is the ignorance of his readers.

*

It takes a lifetime to produce a good sentence and it takes a moron less than a minute to reject it.

*

The secret ambition of every Armenian writer is to be treated like a janitor: to have a steady job, to work for minimum wage, and not to be publicly humiliated if his performance is less than perfect.

*

A nation that values janitors but not writers does not have to suffer a genocide in order to be consigned to the dustbin of history.

*

In the latest edition of the OXFORD CONCISE DICTIONARY OF QUOTATIONS, Saroyan is not included but Cher is ("If grass can grow through cement, love can find you at every time in your life").

*

Monday, March 15, 2004

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All nations from the most primitive to the most advanced engage in some form of propaganda. Armenians and Turks are no exceptions. Turkish propaganda is aimed at Turks and Armenian propaganda is aimed at Armenians. Propaganda works because it relies on willing dupes. Nothing is as easy as deceiving those who want to be deceived.

*

I have seen fat bishops and fat political bosses. I have even seen fat schoolteachers. But I have never seen a fat Armenian poet.

*

What Dante says about his Inferno could also be said of Armenian literature: "LASCIATE OGNI SPERANZA VOI CH'ENTRATE!" (Abandon all hope you who enter here!)

*

I would have given up writing for Armenians twenty years ago, were it not for a letter by an old lady (who died shortly thereafter-may Allah have mercy on her soul, if she had one) who happened to be a pillar of the Armenian-American community. In this letter she accused me of corrupting the young and of changing the tone of Armenian-American journalism. Whenever she now read any one of our weeklies, she said, she invariably came across articles, commentaries, and letters to the editor expressing views similar to mine. All her life, she went on, she had done her utmost to be positive about Armenian affairs and there I was, demolishing her good work.

Perhaps I should explain that before writing that particular letter she had written another and a much more "positive" one in which she praised my dedication and promised to organize a banquet in my honor. To which I remember to have said that I was not in the habit of traveling several hundred miles for lunch and that I preferred to have a cheese sandwich with a cup of coffee in my own kitchen.

*

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

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To write that which your readers will enjoy reading is not literature but literary prostitution.

*

Computers can't think: neither do most men who use them.

*

When a man tries to convince me that he is important, I begin to think of all those reasons why he is not. Which is why I don't hesitate to declare myself unimportant.

*

Sometimes the only way to win a battle is to convince your adversary to underestimate your strength.

*

Whenever an Armenian agrees with me, he makes it abundantly clear that he is delighted to see me catching up with him.

*

Americans welcome criticism and they cherish their dissidents because they know America is bigger than all its critics. Only the abysmally insecure think they can be demolished by a handful of paragraphs.

*

Some Armenians love Turkish music. That's all right. Nothing wrong in that. None whatever. To each his own. Live and let live. What I find slightly suspicious however is when this type of Armenian has no interest in any other kind of music, including Armenian music. He may even think Turkish music is Armenian music.

*

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

**********************************

We all agree that if we want to understand the past and reality in general we must separate fact from fiction and objective assessment from propaganda. And one way to define propaganda is to say that it is a political party's, regime's or power structure's assessment of its own performance.

*

If we were to allow writers to assess their own works, we would have not one but a thousand and one Nobel Prize winners every year.

*

I will believe in divine justice on the day sheep produce a generation of carnivores capable of devouring wolves.

*

To a nationalist historian, his nation is always the good guy and its enemies the bad guys.

*

When nationalist historians disagree, it is safe to assume that they can't all be right and, the chances are, they are all wrong.

*

When a publisher decides to accept or reject a manuscript, he does so by using not literary but financial criteria. This is especially true in the case of publishers who operate on the edge of bankruptcy.

*

Don't believe anyone who says "I love mankind!" A man will say anything to make a favorable impression, especially when he doesn't have to prove what he says. Speaking for myself, I am not particularly fond of my fellow men and, more often than not, the only thing I love about them is the distance that separates us. The greater the distance, the deeper my affection.

*

If a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, we all live in mortal peril and on the edge of the abyss.

*

All your average, decent, law-abiding citizen needs to turn into a killer is a leader who spouts clichés and mumbo jumbo.

*

I welcome criticism. I find it stimulating even when it is wrong; especially when it is wrong. What I can't stand is a dog taking me for a lamp-post and pissing on me, and calling it criticism hoping the difference will escape notice.

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, March 18, 2004

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11th Commandment: Thou shalt not commit acts of cowardice.

12th Commandment: Thou shalt not be a dittohead or someone who repeats someone else's ideas because he has none of his own, or because he is too lazy to think for himself, or because he prefers to repeat only those ideas that justify and legitimize his own misconceptions, fallacies, and prejudices.

*

COMBATING TERRORISM WITH BOMBS AND TOMAHAWK MISSILES IS NOT THE WAY TO BEAT TERRORISM, reads a headline in my morning paper today. And what is the alternative? To negotiate with them? If that ever happens we will read another set of headlines, such as: TERRORIST DEMANDS UNREASONABLE, and TERRORISTS THREATEN TO UNLEASH A NEW WAVE OF SUICIDE BOMBERS IF THEIR DEMANDS ARE NOT MET.

*

I am always astonished at the amount of venom a patriotic Armenian is prepared to discharge on a fellow Armenian who refuses to echo his sentiments and thoughts.

*

And speaking of Armenian tolerance: I shiver to think what would happen to me if I were at the mercy of my adversaries.

*

If you want to know how smart, progressive and civilized Armenians are, visit an Armenian discussion forum on the internet.

*

What's the use of being right when those who are in a position to change things don't give a damn!

*

I don't believe in God but sometimes I wish He existed so that I could go down on my knees and thank Him every day for all my blessings, the greatest being that I live in a democracy that respects my fundamental human right of free speech. I have said this before and I will say it again and again the way others repeat the Lord's Prayer: In another time and place our fanatics would have betrayed me to the Ottoman police or to the KGB -- all in the name of patriotism, of course -- and I would now be a dead man.

*

Friday, March 19, 2004

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It is a mistake to identify a nation with its political leadership especially if the leadership is undemocratic and therefore non-representative. This is the mistake the Turks made when they massacred nearly two million Armenians at the turn of the century. This is also the mistake we make when we identify Turks (half of whom may well be half-Armenian) with Sultan Abdulhamid and Talaat.

*

"A newspaper is a nation talking to itself," Arthur Miller says somewhere. If true, we are a bunch of monomaniacs stuck on Turks. And if newspapers are all about news, I will be damned if I see anything new about the Turks and their crimes against humanity.

*

There is no religious commandment that says "Thou shalt not be a dupe." Perhaps because without dupes there would be no organized religions. Dupes are a religion's bread, butter, and oxygen. And to those who say "This may apply to all other religions except mine!" I say "That's what they all say."

*

No need to hate tribal people - they hate one another even more.

*

On the day a husband begins to notice that his wife cannot cook like Julia Child and tend the garden like Martha Stewart, he has ceased to love her.

*

It is not easy writing for an audience that cannot tell the difference between literature and propaganda.

*

Enemies have longer memories than friends.

*

Men are vain animals. They will even brag about their humility.

*

Movies are misleading. They show a great deal of violence but seldom permanent damage; also, a lot of sex and not enough pregnancy.

*

As for Mel Gibson and his PASSION: to those who say it is not an objective or accurate depiction of events: may I reminded them that the Gospels, as they have come down to us, would not even be admissible in a court of law because they are based on hearsay.

 

Saturday, March 20, 2004

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After delivering a lecture in Yerevan, a friend of mine was approached by a member of the audience who told him: "You failed to give the Communists their due. After all, this very hall in which we stand was built by Communists!" To which my friend replied: "I am sorry for the omission. You see, I was under the impression that it was built by Armenians."

*

In our environment, freedom of the press consists in saying two plus two make five. If you say four, you are in deep doodoo.

*

When politicians speak, they do their utmost to say what their audience wants to hear. Writers are of the opposite disposition.

*

If you are wrong about the present, you can't be right about the future.

*

Once when I said that we have no word for honest, I was told I was dead wrong and that we do have a word for honest and it is "oughamid." Which raises the question: When was the last time you heard an Armenian use that word in reference to a fellow Armenian?

*

Not being much of a traveller, I haven't met too many people. But I have met people who have met people. Once I even met someone who had met one of Rasputin's assassins.

*

Some of my readers attack my opinions not because they disagree with them but because they have none of their own and they resent my right to think for myself. That's the way it is with some folks. If it weren't for them, fascism and all forms of despotism would be unthinkable.

*

When I first heard of Armenians going out of their way to avoid fellow Armenians, I was shocked. I couldn't understand them. I do now. In a year or two I may even join their ranks.

*

Americans love to quote their critics, including foreign critics. Quoting them has become part of their entertainment industry. Armenians, on the other hand….

*

Writing is a pleasure with only one drawback: you cannot choose your readers.

*

One reason there are atheists is that there are believers who behave like swine.

*

Winston Churchill [when told his fly was open]: "No matter. The dead bird does not leave the nest."

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, March 21, 2004

*****************************

To those of my readers who insult me because I refuse to recycle their favorite brand of crapola, I say: Only a confirmed coward insults someone anonymously and from a safe distance, and only a certified moron views this type of conduct as admirable and considers himself a credit to his race as opposed to a disgrace to mankind.

*

The only way to make a living in the kind of world we live in is by providing a real service to one's fellow men. In that sense, a writer provides a disservice because he exposes illusions, lies, prejudices, and fallacies. Hence, his dependence on the charity of swine.

*

The dream of every selfish man is to be perceived as a Good Samaritan. Likewise, the secret ambition of every fool is to be perceived as wise.

*

Homelessland is the name of my homeland.

*

We have all met the Armenian who has been so thoroughly Ottomanized or Stalinized that he considers democracy an aberration, intolerance (which he thinks of as inflexible adherence to noble principles) a virtue, and human rights an evil concept invented by the corrupt West whose ultimate aim is drag the rest of the world down to its own level of moral decline and degeneration.

Whenever I confront such an Armenian I cannot help thinking that these are not his ideas but those of a parish priest (whose prejudices have been blessed by a bishop) or a schoolmaster (whose ignorance has been legitimized by a boss…all in the name of God and Country, of course, and to hell with reason, common sense and decency).

And I write not because I want to change anyone's mind but because I am not old and wise enough to reconcile myself to silence, and even as I go on writing I look forward to the day when I will no longer feel the need to write….

*

Monday, March 22, 2004

***************************

There is nothing new in what I have been saying. Sometimes I feel as though I were speaking about the elephant in the room, and I am surprised when I hear some of my readers asking: "What elephant? What room?" It is for these readers that I go on writing.

*

To some of my hostile readers who go down into the gutter and expect me to follow them, I say: "You cannot defend a nation's honor, a principle, or a noble cause with verbal manure."

*

An Armenian writer is condemned to have more enemies than readers and all his readers might as well be potential enemies.

*

Literature is a matter of collective life and death. A nation that abuses its writers will be abused by history.

*

The law of the jungle is a double-edged sword.

*

What else can I say that hasn't already been said?

Ever since I read one of my own cherished ideas brilliantly expressed by a Greek philosopher who lived 2500 years ago, I can never be sure of the originality of any idea. I say this to emphasize the fact that there may not be any new ideas or new solutions, and the solutions to all our problems may well be out there already, if not in the Bible than in Plato; and those who pretend we need new and original ideas, know little or nothing about what has been said before.

Case in point: if we were to discard the mumbo jumbo from our religion and retain its central message, we would solve most of our problems; because what divides us is not our religion but mumbo jumbo, and a bishop who pretends otherwise fully qualifies as the Pope of all Charlatans.

 

Tuesday, March 23, 2004

******************************

At the turn of the century we dreamt of our historic lands and we were massacred. We now dream to have our massacres recognized by the perpetrators as genocide and we are accused of massacring them. Reality keeps turning our dreams to ashes but we keep on dreaming…and dreaming about the past too, knowing full well that the only thing we can change about the past is perceptions of it. As for the present and the future: we live with the illusion that we are in good hands - which is not a dream but a daydream born of wishful thinking.

*

I rewrite more than I write. One cannot be clear and concise enough. If one of my sentences cannot be understood at first reading, no need to reread it because I plan to rewrite it.

*

For many years I wasn't even aware of the fact that I wrote not what I really felt and thought but what was expected of me. Even when I thought I was free, I lived and thought like a slave.

*

The only unpredictable element in stupid people is their degree of stupidity against which, it has been said, even the gods cannot compete.

*

In Herman Melville I come across a new word:

"sultanism," meaning the exercise of authority with a touch of sadistic pleasure.

*

A mediocrity will be subservient to any regime or power structure

that gives him a regular salary, or a title, or a uniform,

or the license to persecute better men than himself.

There you have it: the root of our sultanism.

#

Wednesday, March 24, 2004

********************************

Because our standards have fallen and because I dare to say so, I am accused of hating Armenians. The only way to explain this phenomenon is to say that it is a symptom of abysmal inadequacy coupled with greed for love. The irony here is that it is not the lovable who are as a rule greedy for love but the hateful.

*

Sooner or later we must all come to terms with our limitations and realize that we are not children and the world is not our mother who will love us even if we behave like swine.

*

It is easy to persuade those who are on your side or are members of the same club of mutual admiration.

*

The Good Samaritan was probably good all his life and he performed many acts of kindness but achieved immortality for a single random act all because someone took the trouble to write about it.

*

 

Divided by clannish warlords of Chinese (Mamigonian), Jewish (Bagratuni) and Assyrian (Ardzruni) descent, defeated and oppressed by nations whom we view as our inferiors, subservient to Turks for six hundred years, massacred, dispersed to the four corners of the world, ours cannot be said to be the past of a proud and great nation. But the worst of it is that, to cover up this fact we have invented a series of big lies and myths which few of us dare to question - myths such as first nation to accept Christianity, the hypocrisy of the West (as if we ourselves were models of honesty and integrity), and the savagery of the Turks (as if savagery were an invention or monopoly of the Turks)….

*

To those who say, if we have survived, we must be doing something right, I say: Why not ask instead: if we have a high mortality rate we must be doing something wrong?

I am saying these things to drive home the fact that we cannot solve our problems by singing patriotic songs and recycling chauvinist crap, or, for that matter, organizing banquets and delivering speeches. To do these things is simply to add hypocrisy and fear of reality to our previous list of vices.

[Vigil]

“It is about time that we loudly repudiate the romantic conceit that ‘My pen is my gun.’ Pens are pens and guns are guns. There are more than enough ‘intellectuals’ in the diaspora. What we need are fighters, soldiers, fedaiis.”

--“A Critique of Past Notions,” The Right to Struggle, p. 194.

Edited May 31, 2004 by Vigil

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, March 25, 2004

*********************************

When something goes wrong in a democratic environment (9/11 is a recent case in point) there are public hearings in which all sides of the issue are examined carefully and dispassionately by a panel of experts. But when a catastrophic event like our Genocide happens, we put the blame on others and we assume our own conduct to have been beyond reproach and criticism.

Result? We learn nothing from history.

And when someone like Sarkis Izmirlian writes a book in which he catalogues and documents the blunders committed by our leadership, he is ignored.

But when an amateur historian like Peter Balakian produces a book in which he puts the blame on others, he becomes a best-seller.

Which may suggest that we value assigning blame more than acquiring wisdom.

*

It is to be noted that Turkish conduct might as well be a carbon copy of ours (or is it the other way around?): they too put the blame on others - Armenians to begin with and the machinations of the West - and they reject all responsibility for the Genocide.

Result? They continue to operate on the assumption that the only legitimate reaction to dissent is oppression and violations of human rights.

*

The opening lines of a memoir I may never write: "Allow me, gentle reader, to introduce myself. I am an Armenian who may not always think as you do perhaps because having lived my own life, I have acquired a set of experiences different from yours. Please, do not consider this fact a capital offense."

#

QUOTATIONS FROM KAREKIN NEJDEH (1886-1957)

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The morally depraved can also voice noble principles.

*

Life is constant and endless renewal. Only the morally irresponsible refuse to understand this.

*

Without renewal, a nation dies every hour, every minute. Our political parties either don't understand this or they have no

desire to understand it.

*

A nation that fails to do what it can and must do has no right to expect foreign assistance.

*

Nations that are unwilling to defend their own interests condemn themselves to death.

*

When dealing with foreign powers and issues, our press adopts a permissive, forgiving, and subservient tone. With our own internal problems, however, it becomes arrogant, vindictive, vicious.

#

Friday, March 26, 2004

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Nobody likes to be criticized and I have at no time heard anyone say: "I deserve the criticism." Which may suggest that, most of the time, most people think they are beyond criticism. This is true of individuals as well as institutions. Hence, the necessity, popularity and prevalence of propaganda.

*

A nation that believes its propagandists and rejects its critics is a nation that values charlatanism above honesty - present company suspected. Such a nation lives on the edge of the abyss.

*

I have several faithful readers who enjoy reminding me more or less regularly that reading me is a waste of time. To them I can only say: "Thank you for reading me."

*

Never argue with someone who knows better, or is an expert on any given subject, or may well be in a position to silence you. To put it briefly: Never argue with an Armenian.

*

On first reading Oscar Wilde's confessional DE PROFUNDIS, an English critic wrote in his review: "Not so are souls laid bare." Immediately the word spread that this critic had used the words "are souls" in the sense of "assholes."

*

And speaking of puns: Whenever I point out the fact that the Armenian word "aghber" is a pun that means both "brother" and " garbage," I am told I am mistaken and I don't know what I am saying. Some even become defensive and angry, and urge me to say nothing further because I may run the risk of shattering our solidarity. The implication being that our solidarity is so fragile that it may be shattered by a single word which is not a pun but may be perceived as one by some misguided souls. May I also add that the word "aghber" is used as a derogatory term by native Armenians in reference to Armenians of the diaspora and, more particularly, refugees who repatriated after World War II.

*

Why should a beautiful word like brother be an insult, unless of course it was intended as a pun?

*

A lie and a contradiction should be exposed not hidden from view, because only when it is exposed it may be resolved.

*

The purpose of civilization, psychologists tell us, is to make the unconscious conscious. Please note that I said civilization, not syphilization.

#

Saturday, March 27, 2004

*******************************

Whenever I say Armenians are smart, adaptable, musical, no one objects. But when I say anything remotely critical, I am accused of reverse racism.

"Not all Armenians have been Ottomanized or Sovietized," a reader informs me. "It is wrong to generalize about people. Armenians are individuals and they deserve to be treated as such, especially by their own kind."

*

We know that Russians, like Germans and French, or Italians and Americans, share in common certain character traits. I suggest speaking of these national traits is not the same as engaging in racism.

*

If I generalize about Armenians it's because we are one people and we have one history and one destiny.

*

We say Turks massacred Armenians, we don't say some Turks massacred some Armenians.

*

When I say subservience is one of our national traits and that if we are not subservient to a sultan or a commissar we are subservient to a political boss, bishop or benefactor, am I being a reverse racist?

*

When Aghbalian said we are "tribal," when Raffi said "treason and betrayal are in our blood," and when Zarian said "Armenians survive by cannibalizing one another," were they engaging in reverse racism? I don't think so. It seems to me, they said these things because they valued objective assessment and analysis above flattery and chauvinist propaganda.

*

[ara baliozian]

“It is about time that we loudly repudiate the romantic conceit that ‘My pen is my gun.’ Pens are pens and guns are guns. There are more than enough ‘intellectuals’ in the diaspora. What we need are fighters, soldiers, fedaiis.”

--“A Critique of Past Notions,” The Right to Struggle, p. 194.

armenian intellectuals are extinct.

at the turn of the century in istanbul we had intellectuals;

we now have academics who are either massacrists or medievalists --

and they are all pro-establishment because they are financially dependent on our bosses, bishops, and benefactors.

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, March 28, 2004

********************************

Men of faith don't listen. They can't listen. Neither do they argue. They prefer to preach and they preach because they need converts to dispel their own doubts. Because, according to an Italian proverb, "Even the Pope of Rome doubts his faith seven times every day." And according to Sartre, "We believe that we believe but we don't believe." In the dictionary of a man of faith the word dialogue is defined as monologue.

*

Men of faith view all men as potential converts. They have no interest in someone else's thoughts and experiences - that is to say, life.

*

To those who ask me why I refuse to answer some of my critics, I say: I ignore only men of faith or critics who speak in the name of a god that legitimizes hooliganism.

*

All men of faith view a fraction of mankind as infidels, or giaours or even infidel dogs who deserve to die or burn in eternal hellfire for the greater glory of the Almighty.

*

Don't get me wrong. I have nothing against faith so long as it remains a private affair between a person and his god. But faith that is organized and becomes militant will inevitably legitimize intolerance and ultimately terror, war, and massacre.

*

All belief systems or -isms have a history. It is their historic context that defines their modes of conduct and not the words in their pious sermons.

*

Sometimes I am dismissed as a writer simply because I happen to be an Armenian writer. Who would want to be an Armenian writer in this day and age? Not that being an Armenian writer at any time throughout our millennial history has been a smart or even safe career move. Which is why I am always careful to identify myself only as a concerned citizen, the implication being: if I think as I do, there must be others (that is, concerned citizens). You may ignore me all you want, you may even silence and starve me, but you cannot ignore a fraction of the community because doing so would mean damaging the integrity of the nation.

#

Monday, March 29, 2004

******************************

Propaganda brainwashes the average citizen so thoroughly that it becomes impossible to expose its lies. Consider the difficulty we are having in our efforts to expose the lies of Turkish propaganda.

*

To those who say our own propagandists speak the truth and those who attempt to expose their lies are liars, I say: That's what I thought too, when I was ten.

*

To those who see something objectionable in comparing Armenian propaganda with its Turkish counterpart, may I cite a variant of Lenin's celebrated dictum: "A bourgeois is a bourgeois regardless of national origin." So is propaganda.

*

Propaganda promotes the interests of the ruling elite and uses the people as a means to that end. The aim of propaganda is to deceive and mislead by means of flattery and such transparent big lies and morally bankrupt notions as "the Chosen People," and "the Superior Race."

*

If the Jews (surely, one of the most victimized people in the history of mankind) and the Nazis (one of the most ruthless and bloodthirsty) share the same grandiose illusion, can the rest of mankind (including ourselves) be immune?

*

Sometimes I am asked: "How do you explain the fact that there aren't too many writers who write as you do?"

My answer: Because most of them were brutally silenced in the Ottoman Empire and the Soviet Union, followed by censorship in the Diaspora. Or, if you prefer, by legal means (de jure) under criminal regimes, and de facto in the Diaspora.

*

If you are wise, you will be insulted by fools.

If you are honest, you will be hounded by charlatans.

If you promote tolerance, you will be torn to shreds by bloodthirsty fanatics.

And if you are objective, you will be buried alive by chauvinist propagandists.

#

Tuesday, March 30, 2004

**********************************

God does not compromise. Which is why men of faith divide mankind into two: believers and infidels. The same applies to our ideologues and partisans who divide their fellow Armenians into yes-men and enemies.

*

I will never forget the partisan leader who once, in my presence, assuming I too was a member of the club, said: "Our enemies, our greatest enemies, are non-partisan (chezok) Armenians…." And I thought of my father: a non-partisan and a survivor of the Genocide, a refugee who lost everything he owned twice, first time during World War I in Turkey, second time during World War II in Greece. He an enemy? He who spent most of his life trying to survive in a hostile environment? A perennial victim who harmed no one?…

*

To our bishops and bosses, disagreement means either heresy or treason. Which may explain why, consensus reached by means of compromise remains an alien concept to our leadership.

*

I welcome criticism but I don't consider insults delivered by brainwashed individuals who cannot read and understand simple sentences in the English language criticism.

*

What I find most offensive about us (and all tribal people in general) is the disparity between our rhetoric and our actions. We pretend to be smart but we behave like political morons, constantly dividing and subdividing ourselves as if the ego of our petty little sultans were more important than the survival of the nation.

*

Once in a while I am taken to task for ignoring my critics. Nonsense! Everything I write -- including commas and semi-colons - is a reply to one of them. Where would I be without my critics? Luckily, writing for Armenians means never to run out of them because every Jack S. Avanakian is a self-appointed pundit or a commissar of culture with a highly developed spirit of contradiction.

*

Wednesday, March 31, 2004

********************************

Armenia is the site of the Garden of Eden but in the original Garden people outnumbered reptiles….

*

We are better at praising the Lord than at passing the ammunition - except when the ammunition is intended for our own kind.

*

When they can't disagree with me, they accuse of me of plagiarism.

*

Like progress, patriotism can be a misleading word.

In the same way that there is the progress of a disease,

there is the patriotism of a fascist hooligan.

And then there is the patriotism of the rascal

who uses the flag to cover his nakedness.

Some of the most ardently patriotic speeches

I have been exposed to were delivered by bloodsuckers.

*

Nobody has ever won an argument with commissars because arguing with them is a one way street at the end of which stands a killer (where commissars are commissars) or a barrage of insults (where ex-commissars are hooligans).

*

If I were to echo your sentiments and thoughts,

why would you waste your time reading me?

If I were to say "Yes, sir!" to whatever

our mini-sultans and neo-commissars say,

who would have any use for another brown-noser?

[Sasun]

God does not compromise.

Are you sure about this?

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, April 01, 2004

*********************************

Overheard: "None of us is as smart as all of us."

And: "I am who I am because we are what we are."

Reject me and you reject a fraction of yourself.

*

A divided community is a maimed community, and a nation divided is programmed to be victimized.

*

We were massacred because our leadership at the turn of the century was divided. Armenians within the Ottoman administration and our revolutionaries failed to reach a consensus. As a result, the people suffered.

*

The unspoken slogan of an ideology that divides a nation is: "If the shoe doesn't fit, amputate the foot."

*

None of us is infallible. We all make mistakes. But an ideology that divides, asserts infallibility by implying that anyone who is against it is an enemy.

*

To an ideologue, deviation is always wrong and dissent a criminal offense.

*

Our revolutionaries operated on the assumption that the West would not allow the Turks to massacre us. Our revolutionaries were dead wrong. They made a mistake. We all make mistakes. But their mistake was so immense and appalling that to this day they refuse to acknowledge it because acknowledging it would shatter their infallibility.

#

Friday, April 02, 2004

***************************

"What's the use?" is the question I ask after every line I write. "You will convince no one and you will change nothing!" I am reminded once in a while even by friendly readers, as if I didn't know. If I go on it's because I am not alone. I have millennia of dissent on my side. It was Plato who first spoke of "the charity of swine," and it is in the Old Testament that we read: "A house divided against itself cannot stand," and "Where there is no vision the people perish."

*

The trouble with man is that even when he behaves like a coward he wants to be perceived as a brave man. It is the same with the unprincipled and the fool. And the chances are, by the time you figure out who is who and what's what, you are so disgusted with your fellow men, including yourself (because, let's face it, none of us is perfect and even the best may behave like the worst) you may end up saying, "A plague on all your houses!"

*

One of the hardest things in life is to overcome this state of apathy and cynicism and to continue believing that your words may motivate others to change their ways, and to go on even after your life has become a series of disappointments with no end in sight.

#

Saturday, April 03, 2004

*******************************

The past is one but there are many versions of it. I believe a historian only when he is critical of his own tribe, nation or culture.

*

History is neither the propaganda of the victor nor the consolation of the loser.

*

A historian is not a lawyer whose function is to defend his client even when his client is guilty. A historian is more like a judge whose function is to dispense justice with as little bias and as much objectivity as it is humanly possible.

*

The aim of a historian is to understand the past and all those invisible forces that have shaped it. Because only when we have understood the past we may understand the present.

*

What is to be done? This is a question that can be answered only by those who have understood the past.

*

A historian's greatest asset is objectivity, his greatest liability, bias.

*

Two contradictory versions of the past can't be both right. Either one or both versions are inaccurate or biased.

*

Can a Christian or Muslim historian produce an objective account of their own respective religions? Even more to the point: Can a Christian historian produce an objective account of Islam and vice versa?

*

Is an Armenian capable of writing an objective history of the Ottoman Empire and the Turkish nation? Can a Zionist historian produce an objective account of the Nazi Party?

Can a victim understand his victimizer?

Can an underdog understand his oppressor or exploiter?

Is it possible for a decent human being to be on the side of the murderer and against his victim?

*

Perhaps one reason mankind has so far failed to eradicate evil (injustice, intolerance, oppression, exploitation, war, terror, and massacre) is that it has failed to understand the invisible and hidden forces that shape it. All the theological and biological reasons (from original sin to the crocodilian part of the human brain) have been of no help.

*

Is it possible to convince the oppressor that oppression is wrong? Can we convince the criminal that crime doesn't pay? Why is it that racism and tolerance are mutually exclusive concepts? Do these questions have answers?

I wish I were in a position to say yes.

The truth is: what we don't know far exceeds what we know. And anyone who says he knows, he understands, or he is infallible, is a liar.

[ara baliozian]

Are you sure about this?

that is not my opinion but the opinion of those who speak in His name. / ara

[Sasun]

that is not my opinion but the opinion of those who speak in His name. / ara

hmm... I misunderstood, it was not very clear.

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, April 04, 2004

******************************

A Turk massacring defenseless women and children in the name of Allah, and a faceless Armenian insulting a fellow Armenian in the name of patriotism, belong to the same species of cowardly swine. And it was Gandhi (whose compassion knew no limits) who said: "A coward does not deserve to be a member of the human race."

*

Am I overstating my case? I wish I were! The only reason a cowardly and faceless Armenian does not massacre today is that, unlike his Turkish counterpart, he lacks the support of a friendly regime.

*

Consider what happened in our homeland in the 1930s (barely two decades after the Genocide) when this type of cowardly swine tortured and murdered some of our ablest writers, among them Axel Bakounts whose famous last words scratched on the wall of his cell were: "They are tearing me to shreds like savage beasts!"

*

Who were these "savage beasts" tearing to shreds a defenseless writer? They remain faceless and nameless to this day.

*

The Turks massacred giaours in the name of Allah. Our killers massacred their own brothers not in the name of God (they were atheists) or Country (they viewed nationalism as a bourgeois aberration), but in the name of Bolshevism. That's the way it is with swine: they will use any excuse to kill. If it's not Bolshevism, it will be Bullshitism.

*

Let bygones be bygones? We don't forgive the Turks for massacring Armenians; why should we forgive and forget Armenians who massacred Armenians?

*

All nations produce their share of swine, why should we be different? Why should we pretend they don't exist?

*

Elsewhere the one-eyed may be king among the blind. Among us, the blind, given the opportunity, will gang up against the one-eyed and tear him to shreds, all the while pretending to be patriotic heroes acting in the name of a higher principle, very much like Turks massacring defenseless women and children in the name of Allah.

#

Monday, April 05, 2004

****************************

At one time or another I have been accused of a great many aberrations, among them: ignorance, bitterness born of failure, hatred, reverse racism, intolerance, ignorance, inability to communicate and prejudice. Some of these charges may well be mud slung indiscriminately in the hope that some of it will stick.

*

Speaking of the charge that I write as I do because I am a failure as a writer, I will say this: There are a great many failures in this world. As a matter of fact, failures have outnumbered successes at all times and everywhere. If I speak as one of them, I speak in the name of the majority and what I say may well be relevant to those who wish to enhance their understanding of their fellow men. The same applies to hatred, racism, ignorance and so on.

*

Not all of us are qualified to be role models and I have at no time pretended to be one. And if we are lesser men, part of the fault may lie with our self-appointed and self-assessed role models or their total absence.

*

Some writers write to acquire new fans. I write for the opposite reason: to lose them. Because I have every reason to believe we all share a common enemy - the truth. I don't claim to have sole possession of the truth. The difference between my critics and me may be the fact that I refuse to settle for a pleasant or comfortable lie. I also refuse to believe that rejecting all lies makes me public enemy number one.

*

I don't believe in insulting even those who insult me. What I prefer to do is place their sentiments and thoughts in a historic context. If the context is offensive to some, why blame me? If I hold a mirror up to you and you don't like what you see there, why blame the mirror?

*

A final note to my critics: If I misunderstand you, I apologize. And if you misunderstand me, I apologize too. Please bear with me. I promise to do better next time - to make myself more accessible, readable, clear, concise and impossible to misunderstand. This process may entail some degree of repetition. Even then, I may fail to convince all of you. For which reason, I beg for your patience and forgiveness.

#

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

******************************

"You stress the negative," I am told again and again.

Even from a critic they want flattery. Even from a dissident they want agreement.

*

I stress the negative? So does medicine. Is it possible to speak of charlatanism in a positive light? Not everyone is a charlatan, granted. Not everyone is a crook or has cancer either. Does that mean we should shut down police stations and jails, or glorify quacks and silence doctors?

*

Ignorance is the source of all evil, Socrates believed. Combine ignorance with the crocodilian fraction of the human brain and the result will be a commissar of culture, a terrorist, and a cold-blooded killer without conscience.

*

Some of my critics speak as though most of the time most Armenians agreed with them. It is this imaginary majority that allows a fool to think he is a smartass, or a smartass to think he is wise, or a phony (whose sole contact with an educational institution is a walk by an elementary school) to pretend to have a university degree.

*

You are a writer when even those who call you unreadable continue to read you. You are on your way to achieving immortality even when those who hate you love reading you.

*

Who benefits if we don't wash our dirty linen in public? The bloodsuckers or their victims?

*

If you speak of honesty to a crook, he will call you a crook, a liar, and an enemy of the nation on the grounds that attack is the best defense.

*

If I were to choose a single sentence that sums up our present situation, it would be, "In troubled waters, scum rises to the top."

*

When a writer uses three clichés in his first paragraph, it is safe to assume that reading what follows will be a waste of time.

#

[Armat]

Let bygones be bygones? We don't forgive the Turks for massacring Armenians; why should we forgive and forget Armenians who massacred Armenians?

Barev Ara

It is all in the scales. Boston "massacre" four dead and yet American books are filled with Boston Massacre etc.

Sure Armenian communists killed many people but not even close to the scale of the Turks and furthermore the Armenian communists were taking their orders from Moscow.

I understand the principles but disagree on the comparisons

[Armat]

Dear Ara you brought this subject up perhaps indirectly and I am curious if there was ever inquire to open the communist era secret files on Armenians intellectuals killed by the communists.

Why this issue to my knowledge was never pressed by the public?I suspect it is not that we forgiven anyone instead perhaps we exercised collective ignorance.

[ara baliozian]

Wednesday, April 07, 2004

*********************************

Every religious person believes his religion to be the only true religion. In a world where everyone is convinced to be right, I'd rather be wrong, if being right leads to arrogance and intolerance, and being wrong leads to the opposite dispositions.

*

To an Armenian writer, the alliance of a bishop or even a priest, is more valuable than the friendship of a fellow writer.

*

There is a type of reader who makes dogmatic assertions on the grounds that once upon a time when he was a child and had not yet acquired the skill to think for himself his schoolteacher or parish priest said so, and it goes without saying that both teacher and priest happen to be infallible even when they express views on subjects outside their narrow field of expertise, such as history.

*

There is also a type of dupe who repeats what he has read somewhere as if there were one and only one source of truth and that source happens to be what he has read. It doesn't even occur to him that there are as many theories or versions of the past as there are historians and to choose the version that is most agreeable to him is the least reliable criterion.

*

When it comes to God, I like to identify myself as someone who does not believe in the god of our priests. When asked if I believe in any god, including a god of my own definition, I can only say that what I don't know and don't understand about my god far exceeds what I know and understand, and I have so many doubts about the little I know that I might as well identify myself as a skeptic, an agnostic, or a non-believer, provided this is interpreted only as an expression of my own inadequacy.

*

It is the height of arrogance and ignorance to claim that a man, any man, is in a position to know God or to understand Him and to be qualified or authorized to speak in His name.

*

#

Thursday, April 08, 2004

**********************************

To those who accuse me of hating Armenians I say: Take a good look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself: "Am I lovable?" I am not suggesting you are hateful, only asking what if? Because if you are in fact hateful, why put the blame on me? Why not shoulder part of the responsibility?

*

The Arabs today refuse to be dominated by the Americans. And yet, we allowed the Turks to dominate us for six centuries. You may now consider the kind of havoc this historic fact wrought on our collective character, image, and worldview.

*

I count among my acquaintances gifted writers who after an unpleasant experience with an unfriendly Armenian critic, they gave up in disgust, they quit, they walked out on the community, the nation, and their identity as if every Armenian were a bastard.

*

"Keep buggering on!" and "Don't let the bastards grind you down!" are two popular English slogans.

*

We brag about survival and the Anglo-Saxons brag about their world conquest. As I see it, we either brag about survival or humble ourselves about our high death rate.

*

Bragging might as well be synonymous with asserting superiority; and superior people don't feel the need to learn and do better - why fix what ain't broken? Which is why they keep repeating history and making the same mistake over and over again.

*

The Melkonian School in Cyprus is closing down and selling out. One possible reason: its name is Melkonian rather than Manoogian.

#

Friday, April 09, 2004

****************************

Convincing a man with a closed mind to open it is the hardest thing on earth.

*

There are those who join a political party because they can't think for themselves. There are also the unprincipled, the useful idiots, and the bum-sucking riffraff who consider themselves beyond criticism on grounds of infallibility.

*

When I speak of swine I don't expect to have their affection.

*

I ignore critics who try to make me the central issue of their criticism, as if my own failures and problems were more important than the problems of the community and the failures of our leadership. I cannot be the problem if only because our problems existed long before I was born. Anyone who is remotely familiar with our literature knows this. But leave it to our self-appointed and self-assessed pundits to ignore this simple fact.

*

I also ignore critics whom I consider potential commissars of culture. To them I will only say that they make me feel as though I were the luckiest man alive if only because this is not the USSR and I am not at their mercy.

*

If some day the Turks recognize the Genocide and accept their responsibility, they will have taken a step in the right direction. Sometimes we forget that our genocide is not our moral problem but theirs. This may explain why Saroyan felt sorry for them.

*

Recycled crap is not conducive to dialogue

and recycled Armenian crap is no exception.

#

Saturday, April 10, 2004

*******************************

Brendan Behan: "Why do I ridicule my country? The first duty of a writer is to let his country down." And: "The dangerous politicians are the ones who call for sacrifice and duty to one's country. They are entitled to six ounces of lead between the eyes - not in the brains, because they have none."

*

Somerset Maugham: "I know that we were the dupes of the incompetent fools who ruled the nations. I know that we were sacrificed to their vanity, their greed and their stupidity." (It is to be noted that Maugham and Churchill were good friends.)

*

Hemingway: "I was always embarrassed by the words sacred, glorious, and sacrifice…."

*

Our partisan editors demand that I recycle their propaganda line. Result? Even dedicated partisans find their weeklies unreadable. And then there are our dupes who have not published a single line worth reading who demand that I echo their sentiments and thoughts as if the function of a writer were to be the parrot of jackasses.

*

In one of his essays Aldous Huxley says one can learn a great deal about style by watching the movements of a cat.

I have learned a great deal by watching my fellow Armenians, not so much about style as about what not to do.

*

In his latest work of fiction titled YELLOW DOG Martin Amis speaks of "high-IQ morons." We have them too. Also low-IQ morons and single-digit hooligans who assess themselves as experts on any given subject.

*

If an Armenian hates like a Turk, can he love like a human being? What if Ottomanism is a virus that attacks the whole system rather than only isolated organs?

*

Sometimes an answer's value is dependent on where it is found: on a printed page or within us?

*

Am I a good or a bad Armenian? Frankly, I am too busy trying to be an honest human being to worry about such meaningless and undefinable labels. But I don't mind admitting that I am a marginal writer of a marginal nation most whose citizens don't read because they are too busy trying to survive in a hostile environment, which includes their own homeland.

#

[ara baliozian]

Barev Ara

It is all in the scales. Boston "massacre" four dead and yet American books are filled with Boston Massacre etc.

Sure Armenian communists killed many people but not even close to the scale of the Turks and furthermore the Armenian communists were taking their orders from Moscow.

I understand the principles but disagree on the comparisons

the turks and the communists behaved in a similar manner in so far as they murdered innocent civilians -- the number of victims belongs to statistics.

as for armenians taking orders from the Kremlin or Stalin: WRONG!!!!!!!!

many armenian communists believed in stalin, the way turks believed in allah. stalin was their allah! / ara

[ara baliozian]

about south-african style truth hearings: there were none in armenia or the ussr in general. but there have been a number of highly detailed documentary books on the subject in armenian. they make fascinating if depressing reading. /ara

[Sasun]

It is the height of arrogance and ignorance to claim that a man, any man, is in a position to know God or to understand Him and to be qualified or authorized to speak in His name.

How can you say that Ara? Based on your own admition that you don't know God, are you concluding that what you don't know others cannot know either. There were some men who knew God and spoke in His name. For example, Jesus. Yet he was the most humble being, not at all arrogant, and not at all ignorant Ara.

 

There have been spiritual Masters that have known God and manifested God. Not only that, they have also left teachings as to how to know God. It is not an easy task - no pain, no gain. It is called a spiritual discipline, and there are various paths. Ara, without taking any of these paths a man, any man, cannot know God.

[Sip]

For example, Jesus. Yet he was the most humble being, not at all arrogant, and not at all ignorant Ara.

 

What? Jesus? Not Arrogant? To me, Jesus is the embodiment of arrogance! "Forgive them for they know not what they do..." don't tell me that's not arrogance!!!!

 

He walked around with all the answers! Don't tell me that's humble! Maybe it was disguised as humble but to me, that's arrogance. Maybe well deserved, being the son of God and all ... but still.

[Sasun]

 

What? Jesus? Not Arrogant? To me, Jesus is the embodiment of arrogance! "Forgive them for they know not what they do..." don't tell me that's not arrogance!!!!

 

He walked around with all the answers! Don't tell me that's humble! Maybe it was disguised as humble but to me, that's arrogance. Maybe well deserved, being the son of God and all ... but still.

I disagree. If you have knowledge of something and say it you are not arrogant. Jesus was merely telling the highest Truth. By his actions he showed that he was humble. One example, washing his disciple's feet - this is not something an arrogant person does. Or dining with pharesees whom he often criticized, or going to Jerusalem sitting on a donkey rather than in some pompous way. He also preached to be humble.

On the other hand, he spoke from the name of God since God had given him the authority. Not because he, a carpenter, was arrogant to claim to be a son of God.

By his teachings, Jesus showed that we are all children of God, that everyone can be as high as Jesus. That is not arrogance to me.

I realize it all comes from how you view Jesus, as an ordinary human being or as something more.

[ara baliozian]

Sunday, April 11, 2004

*****************************

In his memoirs, titled HOLLYWOOD ANIMAL, Joe Eszterhas writes: "A few blocks south of us was a ramshackle little seafront house where William Saroyan once lived, collecting stones. So many stones that when he moved away, he needed two houses to store them."

*

One reason I prefer to emphasize Armenian blunders as opposed to Turkish crimes is that, if we remind ourselves of our own blunders, we may be less prone to repeat them. Whether the Turks will ever learn that killing innocent civilians or violating their fundamental human rights is wrong is up to them. I for one do not care to make a contribution to their moral progress.

*

Besides, by reminding ourselves constantly of the massacres, we may succeed only in reinforcing our image as perennial victims - and victims not only of our enemies and "friends" (like the Great Powers"), but also of our own incompetent and corrupt leadership.

*

We think of miracles as events. We could also think of them as non-events - things that don't happen. Consider the fact that so far we have not been hit by a giant asteroid or drowned in a tsunami or buried beneath the ashes of a volcano. Consider also the number of terminal diseases that we have avoided so far, not to say the drunk drivers, the crazed terrorists, or the deranged serial killers….

*

The Jews have a special prayer for such non-event miracles, one of them being: "Thank you Lord for making me a man rather than a woman." This prayer may well have been a contributing factor to the American feminist movement masterminded (mistressminded?) mostly by JAPs (Jewish American Princesses).

*

May I confess that not being a chauvinist, I have at no time thanked the Lord for making me an Armenian, but perhaps you have….

*

Monday, April 12, 2004

*****************************

When it comes to understanding the past, one of the worst mistakes a Turk can make is to read only Turkish historians. The same applies to all nations.

*

When two nations use the past as a source of documenting unsettled scores, it is safe to assume they have read only one side of the story. In Greece, where I was born, and in Italy, where I completed my education, I was taught two irreconcilable versions of the same events.

*

I have never read a Turkish historian myself but I have read several non-Armenian sources and I have learned more from them not because odar historians know and understand more but because they have no interest in settling scores and in emphasizing the interests of one side at the expense of the other.

*

It would be relatively easy to establish permanent peace on earth if nationalist historians were labeled as enemies of the people and promoters of prejudice, hatred, and war.

*

Armenian anti-Semitism is as repellent to me as Turkish anti-Armenianism.

*

Readers who accuse me of repeating myself are probably the kind of people who go to church every Sunday in the hope that the sermon will be in favor of sin for a change.

*

One reason I don't always read and reply to my critics is that it is a formidable challenge confronting a hostile chorus of pundits. As a concerned citizen I am more than willing to admit error. Why bother arguing the point? Who has ever won an argument with a commissar, a bishop, a mullah, a Jehovah's Witness, a partisan, or for that matter, a self-appointed Armenian pundit or a stone wall?

*

In their recently published OCCIDENTALISM: THE WEST IN THE EYES OF ITS ENEMIES, Ian Buruma and Avishai Margalit write that, to a brainwashed Muslim, a city like New York, London, and Paris is seen as "a zoo of depraved animals consumed by lust." Which is why I feel justified in asserting that Armenian pro-Arabism might as well be synonymous with pro-Jihadism, pro-terrorism, anti-giaourism, and inevitably, pro-Ottomanism. Raffi was right when he observed: "Treason and betrayal are in our blood."

#

Tuesday, April 13, 2004

*******************************

Do you want to make a contribution to the welfare of the community? Be honest. Be objective. Leave propaganda to the politicians. And leave the massacres to the partisans, academics, and lawyers, all of whom are amply compensated for their work.

*

And speaking of compensation: next time you receive a "panchoonie" letter (with the inevitable final line that says: "mi kich pogh oughargetsek" = send us a little money) ask yourself if in the past this particular organization has been accountable. If the answer is no, demand accountability. Don't be afraid to ask questions, such as: How much of your contribution will go to administrative costs? Accountability is not an ugly word. It is, as a matter of fact, a beautiful word.

*

Ignore an Armenian who knows how to sermonize and speechify but doesn't know how to listen.

*

If you observe any irregularity, spread the word, share it with friends, write a letter to the editor. Remember, sunshine is the best disinfectant.

*

All nations produce their share of parasites and we are no exception. Reserve your sympathies for their victims.

*

One reason I reject all claims of moral superiority

is that it is an illusion. To those who say, if it is an illusion,

surely, it is a harmless one; I say, there is no such thing as a harmless illusion. All illusions are harmful if only because

they distort and sometimes even obstruct our understanding of reality. Because if we are morally superior,

it means we must also be nearer to God,

and with Him on our side we can safely assume

to be less vulnerable to the enemy.

But history, reality, and even the scriptures seem to suggest that the Good Lord does not favor those who rely too much on Him and less on themselves.

#

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

*********************************

Historians may not agree on much but they are unanimous on this: no matter how much we know about the past, we will never know everything. Which means that our understanding of history is based on partial ignorance. The question is: What if what we don't know exceeds what we know? What if our ignorance covers a larger area than our knowledge?

*

Last night, on TV, when asked to apologize for 9/11, Bush put the blame squarely on Osama. I was reminded of our revolutionaries who blame 1915 on the Turks.

*

Though more than willing to admit fallibility in general and in the abstract, politicians hate to admit specific failures and blunders. And history repeats itself because they refuse to learn. Think of Nixon and Watergate. Think of Clinton and Monica. By refusing to plead guilty on a minor charge, they paid a disproportionately heavy price.

*

I have a type of anonymous critic whose vocabulary does not go beyond four-letter words. Not all my critics are hooligans, granted. But the problem with my non-hooligan critics is that their criticisms are disguised insults, and their insults, like all insults, are recycled clichés based on hearsay. So much so that I look forward to the day when I will be demolished by a real critic. As a matter of fact, when it comes to criticism, I am like the Belgian virgin during World War II. On the day the Germans occupied Belgium, she was heard saying: "When to the atrocities begin?"

*

Armenians are smart? Maybe - when it comes to selling Oriental rugs. But criticism? Don't make me laugh.

[ara baliozian]

Thursday, April 15, 2004

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We live in a world where everyone is proud of his ethnic origin - his language, his culture, his traditions, his cuisine, and so on. Result? Even la crème de la scum think they are la crème de la crème.

What's wrong with self-esteem? you may well ask. I suggest self-esteem is a euphemism and in time of crisis it may degenerate to chauvinism and ultimately racism, which allows a man to behave like swine and to assert intellectual and moral superiority.

If you know who and what you are, if you have acquired the ability to be honest and objective about yourself and your fellow men, why this need to feel better even when you should feel worse?

Canada is considered to be one of the most tolerant of countries and tolerant to the point of making multiculturalism an integral part of its national identify. And yet, whenever we speak Armenian in public we are subjected to disgusted looks and such clearly audible comments as, "They live in Canada and they should have the decency to speak in English."

The Greeks, surely one of the most civilized nations on earth, called all foreigners barbarians. I have yet to meet an East-Armenian who does not consider West-Armenian an inferior and a bastardized dialect.

Even people with mixed blood, like most Canadians or, for that matter, present-day Greeks, project the image of pure-blooded patriots with a single loyalty.

The problem with ethnic pride is that it tends to promote xenophobia (a Greek word that means fear of foreigners) and xenophobia alienates and dehumanized everyone who is not a member of the tribe -- that is to say, the overwhelming majority of mankind. Which is why I would prefer to live in a world where what is promoted is not ethnic pride but ethnic humility, perhaps because I believe in the brotherhood of all men, including Turks and Armenians.

#

Friday, April 16, 2004

**************************

Historians publish only a fraction of what they know, and by the time what they publish filters down to the average layman, it is reduced to either a cliché or a slogan.

*

Arrogance may well be at the root of all blunders. If true, it follows that humility is the only practical way of avoiding making an ass of oneself.

*

If you ask the wrong question or too many questions, some doctors, I am told, walk out on you, thus asserting their right to choose their patients. One of the drawbacks in writing is that this option is not available: a writer is in no position to accept or reject his readers.

*

Fanatics are as a rule more vocal than moderates. So that, if you are in favor of moderation, don't be surprised if the shouts of fanatics drown the whispers of the moderates.

*

One does not have to be an insurance broker to know that heroes have a shorter life span than cowards.

*

If we don't know why things exist, what can we really know?

*

There is one thing on which I agree with all partisans: their mutual contempt.

*

If you aim at success and you fail, you are a failure. But if you aim at failure and you fail, you are a success.

*

Success is not an easy concept to define. There is a saying in Hollywood: "Success is relative: the closer the relative, the greater the success." The relative values of success has wider applications. Consider the case of President Bush: he may be a success in the eyes of fellow Republicans, a failure in the eyes of Democrats, and a disaster in the international press. "The higher I rise in the eyes of my fellow men," Tolstoy once said, "the lower I sink in my own."

#

Saturday, April 17, 2004

****************************

Big talk impresses only the bigger talker.

*

There is one sure way of knowing if you have advanced in your thinking: to realize that you were not just mistaken or misinformed but totally and catastrophically wrong, and so wrong that the ground beneath your feet was nothing but a cloud of fallacies, illusions and prejudices.

*

The destiny of the hater and the hated is to become reflections of each other.

*

One difference between rich and poor countries is that in rich countries, if you want to kill someone, you hire a killer. In poor countries you do your own killing.

*

Murder Inc. is a capitalist phenomenon. Under communism murder becomes a monopoly of the state.

*

Doubt can be an asset and certainty the worst of liabilities. Try to explain this to a fanatic if you can.

*

Sometimes I am criticized for never admitting error. What utter nonsense! On more than one occasion I have identified myself as a walking blunder. I am an Armenian writer.

*

A culture that produces commissars might as well be synonymous with barbarism.

*

Armenians may sometimes agree on Turks but they agree on nothing else. Whatever national solidarity we have we owe it to the Turks.

Our murderers have become are our benefactors.