Caeserian - Jew - Armenian Jokes

[Caucasian]

NOTE : THE CAESERIANS IN THE JOKES ARE NOT ARMENIAN

 

A Caeserian child finds a gold coin when walking. And a Jew sees him picking up the coin. He offers the child to give it to him but the child says : I'll give it to you if you get me until the tree. The Jew takes him, drops under the tree and wants the coin. But the child wanted him to get in a donkey's position and bray like a donkey as eyes shut. Jewish man closes his eyes and under the tree and brays but sees the Caeserian child go away.

 

Then asks him why he got away. Caeserian child answers him "you know the worth of the coin as a donkey, don't I know its worth as a Caeserian"

 

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In the shop, Jew sees a cat drinking milk from a gold-covered dish. He thinks the dish is too expensive for him and decides to buy the cat. Asks how much the cat costs. Owner says the cat belonged to the neighnour's child.

 

Jewish man offered 5 liras. Owner takes the price higher. Deal goes until 100 liras. While taking the cat out ith himself, the Jew asks the man "I bought the cat but I don't want its meal to be interrupted". The man answers him "No way. How can I sell cats to Jews if I sell the dish?"

 

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An Armenian couple in the breakfast.

- Agop, please repair the taps.

- Why Miriam, Agop a plumber?

2 days later :

- Agop, the lights begin to go off, I get frightened at nights.

- Why Miriam, Agop an electricity engineer?

1 day later :

Miriam says; Agop, I told Kirkor to repair all the damaged accesories.

 

Agop answers "oh Miriam, he's so devilish! He always thinks of his profit and does nothing without something"

Miriam : Yes you're right. He asked me to go to bed with him or to cook a chocolate cake for the repairment.

 

Agop : I'm sure that you cooked the cake, Miriam.

 

Miriam answers " why Agop, Miriam a pastrycook?

 

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Caeserian hears of Papa selling the keys of Heaven and says "some Muslims will go directly to the hell. And I want Hell's key and lang-register right now.

 

After the bargain, Papa sells the paper and the key to the Caeserian. And Caeserian goes out and begins to sell guarrantee documents of not going to Hell to Christians. And Papa calls the Caeserian back when Heaven's keys' sale began to decrease.

 

Papa : Give me the keys of the Hell back

Caeserian : I sold the Hell, I need much money to have it back.

Papa : How much do you want?

Caeserian : 2 jars of gold.

And Papa commands his servants to bring 2 jars of gold to the Caeserian.

 

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A doctor takes 50 liras for the first medical control, 30 liras from the others. A Caeserian enters the room and says "Hello doctor, it's me again" in his first visit. The doctor tells him to strip and says "Your sickness is going well, go on using the same medicine."

Edited August 27, 2003 by Caucasian

[gamavor]

Are we suppose to laugh?!?

BTW thinking about profit seems like much noble undertaking than stealing turkish (kabardin) style.

[Caucasian]

You don't know about Turkey.

 

People of Kaeseria are famous with personalities like in the jokes. You can ask a member from T.R. if you don't believe me.

 

I think you better read it again. I don't mean an Armenian from Kaeseria, these jokes are not ancient.

[gamavor]

Do you think I care?!? Why should I know the turkish word for bush? You better go and advertise it in a Bosnian or Albanian forum, or search the net for Kurdjali. You will find more compassion there.

 

Best regards to kabartino-balkarians:)