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Joke of the day


MosJan

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A Mom visits her son for dinner who lives with a girl roommate.

During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty his roommate was.S...he had long been suspicious of a

relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious....

 

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between him and

his roommate than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, his son volunteered,

“I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you,we are just

roommates."

 

About a week later, his roommate came to him saying,

“Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"

 

He said ,"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just

to be sure." He sat down and wrote :

 

Dear Mother:

I'm not saying that you ‘did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm not saying that you ‘did not' take the silver plate But the fact

remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

 

Love,

your son.

 

Several days later, he received an email from

his Mother which read:

 

Dear Son:

I'm not saying that you ‘do' sleep with your roommate, and

I'm not saying that you ‘do not' sleep with her.

But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she

would have found the silver plate by now, under her pillow…

Love,

Mom.

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Three sons left home to make their fortunes, and they all did very, very well for themselves. They got together recently and were discussing what they each had done to benefit their aging mother.

"Well," said the first one, "I bought Mom a huge house in Beverly Hills."

"I bought her a Mercedes and hired a full-time driver for her."

"I've got you both beat," said the third. "I bought her a miraculous parrot that can recite any Bible verse you tell it to."

A little later, the mother sent out a thank you letter to all three sons. "Gerald -- the house you bought was too big. I only live in one room, but I have to clean the entire house. Milton -- the car is useless because I don't go anywhere because I'm too old. But Robert -- you know exactly what I like. The chicken was delicious."

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  • 4 weeks later...

Boy: Marry me?

Girl: Do you have a house?

Boy: No..

Girl: Do you have a BMW car?

Boy: No..

Girl: How much is your salary?

Boy: No salary.. but.

Girl: No but. You have nothing. How can I marry you? Just leave me, please!!

Boy: I have one villa, 3 property lands, 3 Ferraris, 2 Porsches.. Why do I still need to buy BMW?! How can I get salary when actually I am the BOSS?

Girl: wanna get married?

Boy: GO *()*)() YOURSELF BITCH

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  • 2 months later...

In a recently held linguistic competition held in London and attended by
supposedly the best in the world,

Samsundar Balgobin, a Guyanese man, was the clear winner with a standing ovation which lasted over 5 minutes.


The final question was: How do you explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED in a way that is easy to understand.

Some people say there is NO difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED.

Here is his astute answer....

When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE.

When you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED,

and when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are
COMPLETELY FINISHED!


He won a trip to travel the world in style.

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that's remind me of Socrates

 

"when you merry a good women your a lucky man, when the women is bad you become a philosopher"

 

I'm a lucky man:)

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  • 3 months later...
  • 2 months later...

Ընկերների «գերին»` կրկին ոստիկանների տեսադաշտում

 

 

Հայաստանի ոստիկանությունը հորդորում է հիշել Արմավիր քաղաքի 20-ամյա բնակիչ Ալեքսանդր Պապյանի դեմքն ու նրան ժամանցի վայրերում չսպասարկել, քանի որ հաշիվը չփակելու համար նա ամեն անգամ ահազանգում է ոստիկանության բաժանմունք եւ հայտնում «կատարած» որեւէ հանցագործության մասին:

Վերջին դեպքը տեղի է ունեցել մարտի 7-ին: Քանաքեռ Զեյթուն համայնքի հյուրանոցային համալիրներից մեկում Ալեքսանդրը հյուրասիրում է ընկերներին եւ չթողնելով հաշիվը փակել՝ նրանց ուղարկում տուն: Այնուհետեւ զանգահարում է ընկերներից մեկին, որն էլ Ալեքսանդրի մորը հայտնում է՝ իբր նրան պատանդ են պահում: Ալեքսանդրի մայրը զանգահարում է ոստիկանություն ու ասում, որ որդուն պատանդ են պահել հյուրանոցում: Բերման ենթարկվելուց հետո Ալեքսանդրը ոստիկաններին հայտնում է, որ թմրանյութերի ազդեցության տակ է եւ կեղծ թղթադրամներ ունի: Իրականում, նա ընդամենը ցանկացել է խուսափել հաշիվը փակելուց:

Մանրամասները՝ ոստիկանության տեսանյությում:

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