lady of grace Posted March 6, 2003 Report Share Posted March 6, 2003 >>Crying Husband>>A woman woke in>the middle of the night to find her husband>missing from their bed. In the>stillness of the house, she>could hear a muffled sound downstairs. She went>downstairs>and looked all around, finally finding her husband in the>basement, crouched in the corner, facing the wall, and>sobbing.>"What's wrong with you?" she asked him.>"Remember when your father>caught us having sex when you>were 16?" he replied. "And remember he said I>had two>choices: I could either marry you, or spend the next 20>years in>prison.">Baffled, she said, "Yes, I remember, so what?">>"I>would have been released today." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 17, 2003 Report Share Posted March 17, 2003 Whats THAT?A young couple left the church and arrived at the hotel where they were spending the first night of their honeymoon. They opened the bottle of champagne and began undressing. When the groom removed his socks, his new wife asked, "Ewwww---what's wrong with your feet? Your toes look all mangled and weird. Why are your feet so gross?" "I had tolio as a child," he said. "You mean Polio?" she asked. "No, tolio. The disease only affected my toes." The bride was satisfied with this explanation, and they continued undressing. When the groom took off his pants, his bride wrinkled up her nose. "What's wrong with your knees?" she asked. "They're all lumpy and deformed". "As a child, I also had kneasles." he explained. "You mean measles?" she asked. "No, kneasles. It was a strange illness that only affected my knees." The new bride had to be satisfied with this answer. As the undressing continued, her husband at last removed his underwear. "Don't tell me," she said. "Let me guess.....Small Cox." [ March 17, 2003, 02:36 PM: Message edited by: Azat ] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 17, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 17, 2003 Azat that was good. Send the bottle back >A man enters his favorite ritzy restaurant and while sitting at his regular >table, he notices a gorgeous woman sitting at a nearby table all alone. He >calls the waiter over and asks for their most expensive bottle of Merlot to >be sent over to her, knowing that, if she accepts it, she is his. > >The waiter gets the bottle and quickly sends it over to the woman, saying >this is from the gentleman over there. >She looks at the wine and sends a note over to the man. > >The note reads: >"For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a >million dollars in the bank, and seven inches in your pants." > >The man, after reading her note, chuckles, and sends a note of his own back >to her, and it read: >Just so you know, I happen to have a Ferrari Testarosa, a BMW 850 and a >Mercedes 600 SL in my garage and I have over twenty-five million dollars in >the bank. But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you would I cut three >inches off. >JUST SEND THE BOTTLE BACK." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 hahahaha. One last one for the day.------ An attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub somewhere in Maine. She gestures alluringly to the barman who comes over immediately. When he arrives she seductively signals that he should bring his face close to hers. When he does so she begins to gently caress his beard, which is full and bushy. "Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. "Actually, no," he replies. "Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him" she says, running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair. "I'm afraid I can't," breathes the barman, clearly aroused. "Is there anything I can do?" "Yes there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently. "Tell him," she says,"that there is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies room." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Azat... that was really good ;o) The Meeting A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both startled and he says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll "forgive me."She replies, "If your p**** is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 1221." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Azat jan, et profileit mejine dues? shat kneres, &ishtn asats shat ankamner Glendalei Brand Blvd vra teselem kez, buyt anteselev. Kneres, myus ankam antarber chem lini.. is inch utelikneres sirum? aveli lava utelik arnem tam, kan poghe. Ov giti et poghe inchi vra heto k&axses, sovats mnas.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 lady of grace menq NAx@ntrum enq $$$ Azat jan lav asi che ? lsi der 50%50% enq che ??? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 laver! BTW indz karoghek kochel Nunik! uremn ayspes..30%30% dzez, 40% indz, buyts guaranteem talis vor et hima inchvor sarkumek, I'm going to double it for you.. Buyts lsi, iskakanits @Azati demkna? Esor mer Azate korela, chilini kashkeshuki mecha enkel? Mos, mi hat gtsere stugi.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Nunik jan esor Azat@ Azata chi gortsum iy var@ vor jamin uzes karrora gal kam karror enq gal yev stanal mer hasaneliq $Nverner@ "I'm going to double it for you.." vstah es ??? nayi chposhmanes / Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 ay mart hele gortse cheskesats, poxek uzum, chehaskatsa.. anpayman petka kvyarkman dnenk es hartse. paymanner kan, ban kan.. Azatnel ora gtel azatvelu inch business negotiationsa genum.. vor hivandanotsuma? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 QVYARKENQ INCHU CHE BAYTS YETE MENQ ( YES YEV aZAT@ ) HARDENQ MARDA %45 ENQ UZUM !!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 che daghalutyunnek anum, yes chem xaghum.;)nstatses teghe es inch kerakn enka? tarsi pesel gortsis teghe valokardin cheka. Mosjan, ari es teman pakenk, iskakanits lav chem. Urish gorts yete ka mets sirov koghnem, erexa nayel, banbasanki tema havakel, tuxt u gir anel, tun kandel (meki knoch, kam amusnu glxin sarkel).. etents tetev baner karam, lav stazh unem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 quote:Originally posted by lady of grace:che daghalutyunnek anum, yes chem xaghum.;)nstatses teghe es inch kerakn enka? tarsi pesel gortsis teghe valokardin cheka. Mosjan, ari es teman pakenk, iskakanits lav chem. Urish gorts yete ka mets sirov koghnem, erexa nayel, banbasanki tema havakel, tuxt u gir anel, tun kandel (meki knoch, kam amusnu glxin sarkel).. etents tetev baner karam, lav stazh unem es inch krak & patij er ~ Azat hasiiiiii ~ mi hat Madam Garfildin zangi tesnenq ho Forumn el Tuxt & gir chi arats ~~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 quote:Originally posted by lady of grace:che daghalutyunnek anum, yes chem xaghum.;)nstatses teghe es inch kerakn enka? tarsi pesel gortsis teghe valokardin cheka. Mosjan, ari es teman pakenk, iskakanits lav chem. Urish gorts yete ka mets sirov koghnem, erexa nayel, banbasanki tema havakel, tuxt u gir anel, tun kandel (meki knoch, kam amusnu glxin sarkel).. etents tetev baner karam, lav stazh unem Nunik isk Zoqanchnerin inch karras anes ?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Mosjan, Zokanjneri hartse dzvara.. dra hamar licensea petk, vor amen inch orinakan u makur dzevov verjatsnenk. Es yerort ankama teste talisem chem antsnum, en BAR exames araji ankamits antsa.. bayts tvyalnere handzni indz, tenam inch karam anem. Hech chelini focus kanem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Focus mokus petq chi mez 101% garanty a petq !!! te karroranas es mek@ glux hanes La inchqan j@nshvats pesaner kan karror em urrarkel qeZ mot:) iharke %50 %50 yev cash Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Ya? es chehaskatsa? vonts erevuma, du saghin gortsies dnum, u nstatsed teghe 50%es uzum? en Azatin, es kamu beranin plakate dzere kangnatsreles. Indz esents dzvar riskeri demes berum, du chegites drants ktsatse ktsatsa? Incha kartsumes yes et janachvats pesaneri teghe chegitem, mi hat zokanjit kut tam amen inch kasi. buyts verjum eli kveratsnem, chemetatses. Es gortsi mej du pay chunes. Kam esents, yes ko zokanjin, duel im kisurin (urish ban che, aveli karoghchana, kyanke yerkari, de ari) karas? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 tes vor ches karroranum - izur terr@ el chases te es te en - paez asa vro ches karror etqan ban - lav mi $5000 tranfer ara bank - esor gortsers tuyla - azatn el chi ashxatum ~ benzinn el tangatsela - i vercho azganver gortsa sa du qez qo hogu xorrqum hangsits kzgaz, dzerpazatvelov iyq kextor mi qani milyon dollarits ~ isk menq iyid gumar@ husali dzevov ah k@tanq Shvetsaraklan bankin 85 tarekanum yet k@veradartsnenq qez Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 "Kam esents, yes ko zokanjin, duel im kisurin (urish ban che, aveli karoghchana, kyanke yerkari, de ari) karas?" chhaskatsa L:) duq indz inchi terr eq drel @enkeruhi yes @ndhamen@ $$$$ em havaqum isk duq - portsum eq im annmer dzerqov dzer amusnu Mamayin vochnchatsnel - dzez iyd xerj kin@ inch e arel ha - aseq tesnem ! cheq amachum ! sakayn mi harts dzer kesur@ axchik uni ?? karrora zoqancha natyev ??? yete iyo ~ uremn mi ban kanenq Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 18, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 E~~~ Mosjan... $5K unenai, kits ksarkei, mankuts yerazelem. Vontsor Azati kitnel petk uni, che? De hima hayenk. Lsi, ches kara mi teghits mi $10K &ares, yes u Azate kternis sarkenk, heto yes kez anpaymant tokosov kveradartsenem De lav eskanov yezrapakenk ays yerekon, genumem tun. Tunnel computer chunem.. Computerchist tghanerek, ba chek kara eskan lavutyanes dem mi hat indz computer dasavorek? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 inchhhhh?? qich araj du eyir mez $$ talis hima meznits es uzzum Qit@ sarqen ? inch qit - $$ erni im qit@ k@sarqem - akanjners el het@ - j@kuyt@s chmoranam : ham el qo havanor@ qez aqrden havanela ! el karriq chunes sarqelu vochinch : mi hat el Kampyuter ?? vor vapshe mer kyanq@ utes ??? chhe cherav espes !! Azat cherav aper - inchpes asuam Vlen chk@pav ap - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted March 18, 2003 Report Share Posted March 18, 2003 Heto muys angam Azati qthin ban cheses - inq@ shat sensativa et kormits - Movses Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 19, 2003 Report Share Posted March 19, 2003 quote:Originally posted by lady of grace:Azat jan, et profileit mejine dues? shat kneres, &ishtn asats shat ankamner Glendalei Brand Blvd vra teselem kez, buyt anteselev. Kneres, myus ankam antarber chem lini.. is inch utelikneres sirum? aveli lava utelik arnem tam, kan poghe. Ov giti et poghe inchi vra heto k&axses, sovats mnas.. Kind of. Next time help the needy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Azat Posted March 19, 2003 Report Share Posted March 19, 2003 You guys have too much free time. I was laughing at everything you guys wrote and then I saw the comments about my nose. Movses jan, I think you need to take your Zoqanch hunting with you one day. problem solved. lady of grace jan, Movsesi het biznes anel chi lini. Sagh ore nstats konyana a xmum. Ari iran gortsits hanenq yes yev do biznesi mech mtnenq. 65% inds(boyis hamar) / 35% qez. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lady of grace Posted March 19, 2003 Author Report Share Posted March 19, 2003 Azat? et ko boye iminits inchkan bartsera vor 65%es uzum? zato im mazernel koninitsa yerkar, hima dra hamar yes inckan charge anem? chases mazeret yerkaratsnumes, chem havata. Azat ko kartsikov ko morukna yerkar te im mazere? Im mazere hasnuma minchev gotkateghes, ba ko moruke? chentartsakves ha? Mos? esor du gortsumes?No for real you guys are great. Azat I read all the jokes on this forum and the best ones were your postings. Great sense of humor. Etents humor unes, gites inch business kanenk irar het? Mos du xaghits durs ekar, kez xmelues tvel, eti cheghav.. Have a great day. toghek esor ashxatem.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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