MosJan Posted February 21, 2008 Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 DEMOCRATIC You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. Barbara Streisand sings for you. REPUBLICAN You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So? SOCIALIST You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow. COMMUNIST You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk. You wait in line for hours to get it. It is expensive and sour. CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows. BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLEY ou have two cows. Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain. AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one. You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses. Your stock goes up. FRENCH CORPORATION You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. You go to lunch and drink wine. Life is good. JAPANESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains. Most are at the top of their class at cow school. GERMAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour. Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year. ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows but you don't know where they are. While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman. You break for lunch. Life is good. RUSSIAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You have some vodka. You count them and learn you have five cows. You have some more vodka. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have. TALIBAN CORPORATION You have all the cows in Afghanistan , which are two. You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private parts. You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons. IRAQI CORPORATION You have two cows. They go into hiding. They send radio tapes of their mooing. POLISH CORPORATION You have two bulls. Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them. BELGIAN CORPORATION You have one cow. The cow is schizophrenic. Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish. The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow. The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk. The cow asks permission to be cut in half. The cow dies happy. FLORIDA CORPORATION You have a black cow and a brown cow. Everyone votes for the best looking one. Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally vote for the black one. Some people vote for both. Some people vote for neither. Some people can't figure out how to vote at all. Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you think is the best-looking cow. CALIFORNIA CORPORATION You have millions of cows. They make real California cheese. Only five speak English. Most are illegals. Arnold likes the ones with the big udders. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted February 21, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 What will be the Armenian way ?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVO Posted February 21, 2008 Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 TURKISH CORPORATION You have a cow and a bull. You tell the bull that his a cow. When the bull refuses to act as a cow. You kill the bull and pretend that you never had a bull When people start asking question you say that the bull was torturing your cow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harut Posted February 21, 2008 Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 What will be the Armenian way ?? you have two cows you don't know exactly why, but you're upset with that fact in fact, you're upset with everything and you rant all they long about that fact eventually you "krrral" so much that one of the cows dies you go to freedom square and rant how it's the president's fault... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zartonk Posted February 21, 2008 Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 you have two cows you don't know exactly why, but you're upset with that fact in fact, you're upset with everything and you rant all they long about that fact eventually you "krrral" so much that one of the cows dies you go to freedom square and rant how it's the president's fault... Pretty much... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted February 21, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 Artsax you have two cows you send them to Yerevan At first the one w/ black mark on the face becomes the president then after 8 years white cow takes over the office local cows and bulls are left put of the game Locals don't like / local cows & Bulls go on strike / yergir@ yergir chi & Yerevan mern e Is the slogan The only difference of our Armenian Cows and cows from abroad is - our cows don;t get milked - our cows milk the rest of the nation Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harut Posted February 21, 2008 Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 Artsax you have two cows you send them to Yerevan At first the one w/ black mark on the face one becomes the president then after 8 years white local cows don't like / local cows go on strike / yergir@ yergir chi 10 years Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MosJan Posted February 21, 2008 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 hima mi 2 tari es koghm mi 2 tary en koghm - ova hashvum - batsy vazgen manukyanits Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gamavor Posted February 21, 2008 Report Share Posted February 21, 2008 our cows don;t get milked - our cows milk the rest of the nation Good one! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zara Posted February 22, 2008 Report Share Posted February 22, 2008 I hope this one's ok. HAWAII Hawaii only has two cows. Both of them produce milk. Milk is rare and expensive. Hawaiians can’t afford it. The cows are forced to crack coconuts in a factory and eat Spam for a living. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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