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Nightmare Exam


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Posted 17 August 2000 - 01:36 AM

Instructions: Read each question carefully. Answer all questions. Time
Limit: 4 hours.

HISTORY
Describe the history of the papacy from its origins to the present day,
concentrating especially, but not exclusively, on its social, political,
economic, religious, and philosophical impact on Europe, Asia, America,
and Africa. Be brief, concise, and specific.

MEDICINE
You have been provided with a razor blade, a piece of gauze, and a
bottle of Scotch. Remove your appendix. Do not suture until your work
has been inspected. You have 15 minutes.

PUBLIC SPEAKING
Twenty-five hundred riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom.
Calm them. You may use any ancient language except Latin or Greek.

BIOLOGY
Create life. Estimate the differences in subsequent human culture if
this form of life had developed 500 million years earlier, with special
attention to its probable effect on the English parliamentary system.
Prove your thesis.

MUSIC
Write a piano concerto. Orchestrate and perform it with flute and drum.
You will find a piano under your seat.

PSYCHOLOGY
Based on your degree of knowledge of their works, evaluate the emotional
stability, degree of adjustment, and repressed frustrations of each of
the following: Alexander of Aphrodisias, Rameses II, Gregory of Nicea,
Hammurabi. Support your evaluations with quotations from each man's
work, making appropriate references. It is not necessary to translate.

SOCIOLOGY
Estimate the sociological problems which might accompany the end of the
world. Construct an experiment to test your theory.

MANAGEMENT SCIENCE
Define management. Define science. How do they relate? Why? Create a
generalized algorithm to optimize all managerial decisions. Assuming an
1130 CPU supporting 50 terminals, each terminal to activate your
algorithm; design the communications interface and all necessary control
programs.

ENGINEERING
The disassembled parts of a high-powered rifle have been placed in a box
on your desk. You will also find an instruction manual, printed in
Swahili. In ten minutes a hungry Bengal tiger will be admitted to the
room. Take whatever action you feel is appropriate. Be prepared to
justify your decision.

ECONOMICS
Develop a realistic plan for refinancing the national debt. Trace the
possible effects of your plan in the following areas: Cubism, the
Donatist controversy, the wave theory of light. Outline a method for
preventing these effects. Criticize this method from all possible points
of view. Point out the deficiencies in your point of view, as
demonstrated in your answer to the last question.

POLITICAL SCIENCE
There is a red telephone on the desk beside you. Start World War III.
Report at length on its socio-political effects, if any.

EPISTEMOLOGY
Take a position for or against truth. Prove the validity of your
position.

PHYSICS
Explain the nature of matter. Include in your answer an evaluation of
the impact of the development of mathematics on science.

PHILOSOPHY
Sketch the development of human thought; estimate its significance.
Compare with the development of any other kind of thought.

GENERAL KNOWLEDGE
Describe in detail. Be objective and specific.

*** EXTRA CREDIT ***
Define the universe; give three examples

#2 Guest__*

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Posted 22 August 2000 - 12:09 PM

lol..how funny

although doesn't look too far fetched..some professors would actually do this..flakes!! (I'm fed up with school, can you tell..lol)

gayancho

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Posted 22 August 2000 - 12:19 PM

Twenty-five hundred riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom.
Calm them.


give them petrodollars!

#4 Guest__*

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Posted 23 August 2000 - 05:11 AM

quote:
Originally posted by Iranyar:
Twenty-five hundred riot-crazed aborigines are storming the classroom.
Calm them.


give them petrodollars!


or if they are little kids give them kitkat with coca cola!




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