QUOTE (Em @ Apr 10 2008, 08:50 AM)

Zara jan, I went back and reread the questions I had asked. I was just thinking out loud after reading your post. Disregard.
Not going to touch the God part. THought I don't agree with one part of what you said...
"I won't believe in anything that I don't understand or know."
I don't understand or know a lot of things that occur, but they are occuring nonetheless. But if you menat that since it cannot be proven that is why you cannot believe, then I understand what you meant.

Second part sums it up I guess. But it's not that I can't believe. I don't want to. Not yet. People always change their minds and opinions. Maybe I'll change mine about faith and religion some day.
QUOTE (Em @ Apr 10 2008, 08:50 AM)

~~~~~
My main point was that sometimes we shock ourselves. I thought I knew myself so well. I thought I knew myself far better than I do. And sometimes I do things which I thought were beyond me, my abilities, and I understand that i never pushed or have never seen myslef outside/beyond the box that I was put in. As an adult, I see how damagaing that was for my personality, my ego and my ability to strive for something more challenging, something “a girl shouldn’t necessarily do”.
And other times I disappoint myself. I know I’m better than my actions but I make mistakes anyway. Something which doesn’t necessarily harm me, but which inflicts it’s mark deeep enough to cause me worry and to make me question myslef- whether I know theperson who I am and ll I am capable of.
When I was your age (I saw) I was so sure of everything. The questions I asked were not to myself but to the world. I thought I had all the answers. “They” were in the wrong, not I.
But the older I get older, the more I realize I don’t know much...

I'm never sure of myself. Trust me on that one. And sometimes it's no ones fault but things turn out a certain way and you have to deal with what you've got. I don't view myself as 'untouchable' and 'on top of the world'. I'm working from the bottom up.
QUOTE (Em @ Apr 10 2008, 08:50 AM)

I have just learned a major life lesson in the past few years...I have been too trusting, to open and willing to accept people. I so wanted to see the good in them and to prove to myself that people are good for the most part. But life has proven otherwise. So now I am selective as to who I care for, who I pay mind to , who can associate with my daughter and be in our lives (especially so called “relatives”). I have lived and learned. And things are falling into place.
Aging is a privilege, a gift, wisdom, contentment, security in one’s self. I am happy that I am not seventeen or even 21 anymore. I look forward to aging.

I was like that a long time ago. Before I started questioning anything and everything seriously. I've been used ever since I can remember so I learned through trial and error that it doesn't turn out very well. With family, friends, co-workers, superiors, and so on.
Personally, I don't want to age. Every year passes by so quickly. It feels it was just yesterday and you don't feel it until you think about it. Sad part is that the better the time you're having the faster time goes by. On top of that, I feel like I've wasted a large portion of my life doing something I never wanted to do.
Edited by Zara, 10 April 2008 - 06:40 PM.