I entered this forum in hopes that all of you guys and girls would have a better perspective for me in my situation. I'm hoping someone can help me make sense of things and help heal a really really broken heart.
For the past 3 years, I have been in an interracial relationship with my boyfriend (who is of Armenian descent). I myself, am not Armenian, but of Asian descent. We recently broke up because of "irreconcilable issues" which to this day, I still do not know what they are.
In the beginning as all relationships are, everything was great and we were together for a good amount of time each week. As the years progressed, I met everyone except for the two people I should have met... the parents. I have always been open for him to attend my family functions etc.. but he always seemed put off by that fact.
As more time passed, I've been noticing that he always spent more time with his friends than he did with me. His friends even asked me why he doesn't bring me around and I really don't know what to say.
I got really nervous a month ago (the day we broke up) and I checked his email out of curiosity. I was shocked (but not too shocked) to see a bunch of emails referring to an Armenian dating site. He caught me in the act, but at the same time, I felt as if I caught him red handed too. I asked him about the site and he told me it was just something his friends said was cool to join... around a year ago! (that's how far the emails date back). He told me it wasn't his thing, but my point is, he wouldn't have made an entire profile up if he wasn't hoping to meet a new girlfriend of the same nationality.
I asked if he was happy and he said no... I asked why and he said he "didn't know." He said there are issues that can't be resolved and I asked him what issues... but he couldn't name anything specific- he said he just "knew". He said he wanted to take a break for now. So in the end of that night, I basically couldn't be with someone who didn't want to be with me.. someone who's dragged me along for too long if he really couldn't accept me for who I am.
I guess the whole point of the this story is, he tells me that he loves me for 3 years, but this happens. I know that he has never dated an Armenian girl before and I know there are certain levels that I do not know how to connect with him on, and he has that yearning to date his own culture. But I on the other hand, have dated my own culture and have had more problems in that relationship than I did in this one... I truly loved this person regardless of nationality and was open to communication- the whole nine yards. In the end, I ended up with this broken heart which I'm still trying to heal.. but it's only been a month since the breakup.
I understand that it is probably deeper to date someone in your own culture.. but doesn't true love count for anything anymore? Does anyone have words of wisdom for me?
Thank you!!!
I am really sorry for what happened to you, but do you really think that he( the guy you used to date) feels the same way as you do,, You are feeling sad and trying to find answers for this whole situation, I am not trying to seem harsh on you, but do you really think he thinks and worries about this situation the way you do,, you are young and I am sure will have happy life with a person who will really love you and adore you,, so move on and be happy ,, I really had bad times in my life too, but never gave up on it,, so cheer up.. good luck.