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The Wedding Night


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#21 Eloren

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Posted 14 November 2005 - 11:10 PM

QUOTE (sSebB @ Nov 14 2005, 05:20 AM)
I would end it. I am a virgin and will be until I get married, I expect my wife to be a virgin also.


It's a shame to end a love story because of some principles.. that is when you regret most..

Not being a virgin does not mean being "dirty" or "disgusting". What is disgusting is those guys/girls that only think about having sex with the most people without even having feelings for them.. Just for personal pleasure.

#22 kakachik77

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Posted 14 November 2005 - 11:22 PM

QUOTE (Eloren @ Nov 15 2005, 12:10 AM)
It's a shame to end a love story because of some principles.. that is when you regret most..

Not being a virgin does not mean being "dirty" or "disgusting". What is disgusting is those guys/girls that only think about having sex with the most people without even having feelings for them.. Just for personal pleasure.


that would be me, lol, i know i am really bad ...hehehe...i knew that personal pleasure thing was wrong, how could i get it wrong again.

#23 Eloren

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 12:13 AM

QUOTE (kakachik77 @ Nov 15 2005, 09:22 AM)
that would be me, lol, i know i am really bad ...hehehe...i knew that personal pleasure thing was wrong, how could i get it wrong again.


You are EEEEVIL!! mad.gif

Just kidding.. Many of us may have done it in their "youth period" wink.gif But i just find it irrespectful now. And you get far more pleasure when you do it with somone you love wub.gif

#24 aSoldier

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 12:35 AM

QUOTE (Anahit @ Nov 15 2005, 02:36 PM)
NEVER SAY NEVER smile.gif
U know, sSebB, i not only used to think like u, but even feel: I always felt disgusted towards the guys i knew had have many girlfriends. Even there was this guy madly in love with me, and all my friends, family members all wanted me to marry him, but i couldn't even kiss him! blah! cause i knew he had many girlfriends before (he was very handsome and quite rich). i even would feel disgusted when he'd hold my hand.
STILL, i did marry a guy, my husband, who was not a virgin: of course! how could he be? such a handsome guy! girls just die for him! biggrin.gif but i love him soooooo much, that i really don't care about it, i really don't feel disgusted to be with him; in fact, i can't spend an hour without huging and kissing him tongue.gif something i'd never do and don't feel like doing with any other guy, cause i feet they have been with others... i feel disgusted. i know, this kind of feeling is not very right, but i am quite strange in many other ways too, so... i guess this is just another "Anahit thing" smile.gif
So... love changes our ideas and feelings, trust me!


I'm sure you were a virgin when you got married though, correct? I understand what you mean and what you're trying to say, and there is probably a good deal of truth to your post. But I'm sure not every girl is OK with their husbands not being virgins. Some are, but they are usually the ones that dont have strong morals (not that I'm calling you one of them tongue.gif).

#25 Anahit

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 07:59 AM

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But I'm sure not every girl is OK with their husbands not being virgins. Some are, but they are usually the ones that dont have strong morals.


Oh, sSebB, u shouldn’t think like that about other girls: having the fact, that every man (well, ALMOST every man, as we have some nice guys around, like u) is not a virgin before their marriage, it “forces” girls to have no choice but marry men who have already been with many other women before; WHAT CAN WOMEN DO ABOUT IT? If girls wait for virgin man, they’ll never get married! Admit it! It’s much much easier (and more and more difficult smile.gif ) to find a virgin girl than a man! If it was in my hands, I’d wish for everyone to marry the ones they deserve (meaning in all aspects of life) ! But people get married because of love, and falling in love is something that can’t be measured by principals and ideas: like Russians say, “Lyubov’ zla, bolyubish i kozla!”.
Plus, it is soooooo difficult to find someone u love, YOUR OTHER HALF, someone who makes u feel so happy, that u envy yourself, so when u do, trust me, no principle or ideology should keep u away from that person: two people in love must "eliminate" smile.gif everyone and everything that comes between them!

#26 gamavor

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 10:20 AM

This topic reminded me an old joke!

A newly wed couple (both of them broke and jobless) lying in the bed. On the next morning the groom showed some concern and asked the bride:

- Darling, what we gonna have for breakfast?

The bride goes:

- Love, honey!

They went back to the bed. On the next morning, same question and same answer. On the third morning the groom wakes up early and goes naked close to the heater.

- Darling, what the hell are you doing there? - The bride asked.

And the groom goes;

- Warming up the breakfast, sweetheart!
tongue.gif

#27 Harut

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 10:28 AM

"arajin gisher@, zoqanchn u aner@
anhanper spasum en karmir xndzorin...
arajin gisher@, pesi hern u mer@
anhanper spasum en karmir xndzorin..."

#28 Harut

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 10:32 AM

amusnanaluts mi shabat heto@ abarantsun hartsnum en, harsd kuys er? abarantsin el te...
"aranjin gisher@ vrrodi kuyser... yerkrord gisher@ enqan el chjogi... bayts yerord gisher@ biti @nga vor kuys chi..."

#29 gamavor

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Posted 15 November 2005 - 08:23 PM

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Virginity is just as rediculous (if not more) than complete sexual promiscuity. I think by the time people decide to marry they should have experienced a few things in life ... this includes different people, different sexual partners if you will, living on their own, traveling if possible, supporting themselves, etc etc.

Only then will they be able to make an informed and wise decision about who they want to spend the rest of their lives with and how.


AMEN! smile.gif

#30 aSoldier

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 12:34 AM

QUOTE (Anahit @ Nov 15 2005, 11:59 PM)
Oh, sSebB, u shouldn’t think like that about other girls: having the fact, that every man (well, ALMOST every man, as we have some nice guys around, like u) is not a virgin before their marriage, it “forces” girls to have no choice but marry men who have already been with many other women before; WHAT CAN WOMEN DO ABOUT IT? If girls wait for virgin man, they’ll never get married! Admit it!


Yeah, I guess you're right. But I personally choose to stay virgin. As you said, women are "forced" to have no choice but marry men who have already been with many other women before. I find that sad...don't you?

I want my wife to know that I saved my virginity for her, something I know she would appreciate smile.gif

And when people say they want someone experienced...what's marriage for?? You have many many years to get experience with your partner...

And BTW, I'm not a nice guy tongue.gif just a commited Christian biggrin.gif

Edited by sSebB, 16 November 2005 - 12:35 AM.


#31 Accelerated

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 02:24 AM

QUOTE
A newly wed couple (both of them broke and jobless) lying in the bed. On the next morning the groom showed some concern and asked the bride:

- Darling, what we gonna have for breakfast?

The bride goes:

- Love, honey!

They went back to the bed. On the next morning, same question and same answer. On the third morning the groom wakes up early and goes naked close to the heater.

- Darling, what the hell are you doing there? - The bride asked.

And the groom goes;

- Warming up the breakfast, sweetheart!


lol.gif - thats one of the funniest jokes Ive read on this board.

#32 kakachik77

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 09:56 AM

QUOTE (sSebB @ Nov 16 2005, 01:34 AM)
Yeah, I guess you're right. But I personally choose to stay virgin. As you said, women are "forced" to have no choice but marry men who have already been with many other women before. I find that sad...don't you?

I want my wife to know that I saved my virginity for her, something I know she would appreciate smile.gif

And when people say they want someone experienced...what's marriage for?? You have many many years to get experience with your partner...

And BTW, I'm not a nice guy tongue.gif just a commited Christian biggrin.gif


are you sure you're going to perform well? I mean normally it takes some time for men and women to develop their sexuality and for men to last long etc etc. And if you don't you might have a very depressed wife. So consider those options.

#33 Anileve

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 10:21 AM

I know it sounds a bit preposterous, but I am speaking from my experience. I don't think it's very necessary for a man to be experienced as much as a woman. Female body is a lot more complicated and varies for every woman, where as male sexuality is not as complicated. So it takes an experienced woman to know what she likes in the act and what pleases her. I found that regardless if a man is highly experienced it's rarely an indication of his "skills," some of the most experienced men are lousy lovers. Where as if a woman is sexual and knowledgeable of her sexual mechanism she will turn any man into a good lover. So I think our society has the system backwards. If one condition has to be chosen I would say that it's a better match if a man is a virgin and a woman is experienced. But that's just my opinion, I guess it varies from a person to person.

#34 kakachik77

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 12:19 PM

QUOTE (Anileve @ Nov 16 2005, 11:21 AM)
I know it sounds a bit preposterous, but I am speaking from my experience. I don't think it's very necessary for a man to be experienced as much as a woman. Female body is a lot more complicated and varies for every woman, where as male sexuality is not as complicated. So it takes an experienced woman to know what she likes in the act and what pleases her. I found that regardless if a man is highly experienced it's rarely an indication of his "skills," some of the most experienced men are lousy lovers. Where as if a woman is sexual and knowledgeable of her sexual mechanism she will turn any man into a good lover. So I think our society has the system backwards. If one condition has to be chosen I would say that it's a better match if a man is a virgin and a woman is experienced. But that's just my opinion, I guess it varies from a person to person.


that's a really great point but this kind of thinking will "fly" in the Western millieu, now try arguing the same amongst Armenians...sexuality is a supressed subject (not as bad as in some others cultures), nonetheless female sexuality is even more suppressed. Otherwise, I am 100% with you.

#35 vava

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 12:23 PM

QUOTE (Anileve @ Nov 16 2005, 11:21 AM)
some of the most experienced men are lousy lovers.


Can I modify this? I would replace 'lousy' with 'lazy'.
I know I'm generalizing here - but most sexually prolific men are out to satisfy their own urges/needs, and not necessarily those of his partners. As a result, they may pay less attention to certain aspects of the sexual act that are more geared towards her satisfaction. What an eager, less-experienced lover lacks in terms of 'experience' he will certainly make up for with his enthusiams, and genuine desire to 'prove' himself as a good lover. What it boils down to is motivation I suppose...

#36 vava

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 12:26 PM

QUOTE (kakachik77 @ Nov 16 2005, 01:19 PM)
that's a really great point but this kind of thinking will "fly" in the Western millieu, now try arguing the same amongst Armenians...sexuality is a supressed subject (not as bad as in some others cultures), nonetheless female sexuality is even more suppressed. Otherwise, I am 100% with you.


Agreed. As a 'progressive' Armenian male, I couldn't care less if my lover is a virgin or not. But many men have want it both ways. They like to have lots of sex with many women before marriage - but then they turn around and expect virginity upon marriage. It simply can't happen that way - there won't be enough virgins!

Edited by vava, 16 November 2005 - 10:50 PM.


#37 Azat

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Posted 16 November 2005 - 10:01 PM

I have to say that I do care if my potential lover is a virgin or not. i personally dont care for virgins.

#38 aSoldier

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Posted 17 November 2005 - 12:51 AM

QUOTE (kakachik77 @ Nov 17 2005, 01:56 AM)
are you sure you're going to perform well? I mean normally it takes some time for men and women to develop their sexuality and for men to last long etc etc. And if you don't you might have a very depressed wife. So consider those options.


If that was the case, God would have made pre-marital sex acceptable and not a sin. He has the perfect plan for us, and this is not an indulgence you should give in to...

Proverbs 6:32
==========
"But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment;
whoever does so destroys himself."


Matthew 5:27
=========
"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery'."


Romans 1:24
=========
"Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another."

#39 Eloren

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Posted 17 November 2005 - 01:14 AM

QUOTE (sSebB @ Nov 17 2005, 10:51 AM)
If that was the case, God would have made pre-marital sex acceptable and not a sin. He has the perfect plan for us, and this is not an indulgence you should give in to...

Proverbs 6:32
==========
"But a man who commits adultery lacks judgment;
whoever does so destroys himself."
Matthew 5:27
=========
"You have heard that it was said, 'Do not commit adultery'."
Romans 1:24
=========
"Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another."


Who is talking about "adultery" in here? Having sex with a women out of marriage is not adultery.

And about "God would have made pre-marital sex acceptable and not a sin". God also made knowledge a sin.. remember why our poor ancestors were thrown out of Eden? wink.gif


God did not make sexual desire a sin. Men made it.

#40 aSoldier

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Posted 17 November 2005 - 04:30 AM

QUOTE (Eloren @ Nov 17 2005, 05:14 PM)
Who is talking about "adultery" in here? Having sex with a women out of marriage is not adultery.

And about "God would have made pre-marital sex acceptable and not a sin". God also made knowledge a sin.. remember why our poor ancestors were thrown out of Eden? wink.gif
God did not make sexual desire a sin. Men made it.


They were thrown out because satan tempted them and tricked them into thinking they can eat the apple and nothing would come about. That is a direct disobedience towards God, so I don't know what you mean by knowledge as a sin.

And yes, sex out of marriage is adultery...

Just to set the record straight, God did not create sin (sexual desire), satan did. Humans are sinners by nature (because of Adam+Eve) as a result.




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