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Do We Need To Mary Them Or Not?


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#21 gevo27

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Posted 17 May 2004 - 05:21 PM

QUOTE (America-Hye @ May 16 2004, 12:01 PM)
Azat,

No shame in telling the TRUTH. You hit the bulls eye. That is SO very true. East Coast Armenians and European Armenians are NO different.

Its the girls you meet, not all of them.. bad luck? or bad taste>? or out of desperate situations.? i dont think this is wide spread to even generalize in any fasion... sry.. but i dont see how this is right. sure for some cases.. but no way.. not all smile.gif

#22 Vigil

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Posted 18 May 2004 - 03:43 AM

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Edited by Vigil, 31 May 2004 - 04:43 AM.


#23 Anonymouse

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Posted 18 May 2004 - 09:43 PM

Basically people who complain about never finding that right Armenian, are self-centered, think too highly of themselves, and are way too picky, and they shouldn't even bother waiting for an Armenian. I'm quite fed up with the "Ohh I can't meet the right Armenian". If you aren't going to compromise and youre way too individualistic to sacrifice, of COURSE you're not going to meet you're dreamy Armenian. Stop wasting time, and cut to the chase.

#24 gurgen

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 10:01 AM

QUOTE (Anonymouse @ May 19 2004, 04:43 AM)
Basically people who complain about never finding that right Armenian, are self-centered, think too highly of themselves, and are way too picky, and they shouldn't even bother waiting for an Armenian. I'm quite fed up with the "Ohh I can't meet the right Armenian". If you aren't going to compromise and youre way too individualistic to sacrifice, of COURSE you're not going to meet you're dreamy Armenian. Stop wasting time, and cut to the chase.

Thank God at least someone talks sense here.

#25 loxxsqueen

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 11:37 AM

I am an Armenian, and proud, but in no way a nationalist. I believe people are free to choose who they want to be with, and yes that includes Armenians. If you marry an Odar, your culture maybe lost through your kids and their kids. Its inevitable, however I've notice this forum does a really good job of deciphering who may be 1/16 the Armenian tongue.gif . To say that the assimilation of Armenians as a whole is inevitable because of Armenians marrying odars, I think is a huge stretch of the imagination.

It depends on the individual, with what ideals he/she was brought up, to what environment he/she was exposed to, and how they shaped as a free-thinking individual.

THere are Armenians out there, esp women, who marry just for the sake of getting married (to an Armenian). Some of them havnt even been a relationship before in order to learn and understand what being in a relationship entails. I know of girls who have been married under the age of 20 for God knows what reason.

Having things in common with your partner is number one. BUT that doesnt mean that two Armenians belong with eachother because they're Armenian.

I think all Armenians are free to chose whom ever they want to be with. Love and understanding are based on Trust and communication. Hey, if you live, eat and breath for the Armenian cause, find an Armenian and have lots of kids, to make up for the ones we lost. But if you find love else where, so be it.

#26 DominO

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 12:27 PM

QUOTE (Anonymouse @ May 18 2004, 09:43 PM)
Basically people who complain about never finding that right Armenian, are self-centered, think too highly of themselves, and are way too picky, and they shouldn't even bother waiting for an Armenian. I'm quite fed up with the "Ohh I can't meet the right Armenian". If you aren't going to compromise and youre way too individualistic to sacrifice, of COURSE you're not going to meet you're dreamy Armenian. Stop wasting time, and cut to the chase.

Funny, and this comming from someone that never had a girlfriend. biggrin.gif

#27 Azat

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 03:27 PM

Domino and Anonymouse will you two stop the game of just attacking each other.

#28 Anonymouse

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 03:30 PM

I'm innocent I tells ya, he started. But in any event, no one is forcing anyone to marry an Armenian, it's just those people that are pretensious about "not finding the right one" need to stop being prissy and actually compromise. You aren't gonna get the total package so move on. Personally, if I don't marry an Armenian, I won't bother marrying, but that's just me. I have a stronger will power than others. If you want to do whatever you want, fine, but don't make up silly excuses.

#29 DominO

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 04:14 PM

QUOTE (Azat @ May 19 2004, 03:27 PM)
Domino and Anonymouse will you two stop the game of just attacking each other.

Hmmm... come on, I was just joking around. smile.gif Perhaps was there a reply from him I havn't read? huh.gif

#30 gamavor

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 06:24 PM

Guys, you are pathetic wink.gif I say every decent Armenian man should have an Armenian wife, (who cleans, takes care of the household, preferebly works, cooks and performs all other noble activities for the sake of the family) and......on a side has number of non-Armenian lovers. tongue.gif

#31 ExtraHye

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 06:47 PM

QUOTE (gamavor @ May 19 2004, 06:24 PM)
Guys, you are pathetic wink.gif I say every decent Armenian man should have an Armenian wife, (who cleans, takes care of the household, preferebly works, cooks and performs all other noble activities for the sake of the family) and......on a side has number of non-Armenian lovers. tongue.gif

While the guy thinks the girl is doing the cooking and cleaning... A smart Armenian woman will pay someone else to do all of the above wink.gif ... On the side, she would be partying with rich non Armenian hunks, the once who will wine and dine her wink.gif While the "decent Armenian Man" is wasting his money. wink.gif tongue.gif

#32 gevo27

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    Its one of the most beautiful sights... now i have to go see it.

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:58 PM

QUOTE (Vigil @ May 18 2004, 03:43 AM)
Dude I am going to explain this in a simple manner...
........

huh.gif <<<<< riggggghhhhhhhhhhhttttttttt...........

#33 gamavor

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Posted 19 May 2004 - 09:42 PM

Extra, I love YOU!!! Muah! wub.gif kiss1.gif kisss.gif

#34 Vigil

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 12:09 AM

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Edited by Vigil, 31 May 2004 - 04:44 AM.


#35 Harut

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 01:39 AM

Vigil
i'm an armenian living in armenia, married to non-armenian. do i still lose my "armenianity"?

#36 loxxsqueen

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 07:07 AM

Vigil, I completely disagree with your ideology. I AM proud to be an Armenian, but not nationalistic. Armenians are not better or superior to any other group of people on this earth. Armenians see themselves so much that they end up dividing amongst themselves. Its ridiculous. Taking steps to preserve nationality is not the only thing that defines a nationalist.

You are ludicrous to say that if an Armenian marrys outside that they are no longer Armenian. I am not sure yet where you get the justification to dictate such a statement.

In your post you made A LOT of generalizations, even though I admit myself that it's hard not to do so.

Nothing I or any other Armenian out there does can take away their Identity...
Not marrying outside, not experiencing, enjoying and respecting other cultures along with their own, not anything. Sorry you live in such a bubble.

#37 mx5

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 12:32 PM

QUOTE (loxxsqueen @ May 20 2004, 07:07 AM)
Vigil, I completely disagree with your ideology. I AM proud to be an Armenian, but not nationalistic. Armenians are not better or superior to any other group of people on this earth. Armenians see themselves so much that they end up dividing amongst themselves. Its ridiculous. Taking steps to preserve nationality is not the only thing that defines a nationalist.

You are ludicrous to say that if an Armenian marrys outside that they are no longer Armenian. I am not sure yet where you get the justification to dictate such a statement.

In your post you made A LOT of generalizations, even though I admit myself that it's hard not to do so.

Nothing I or any other Armenian out there does can take away their Identity...
Not marrying outside, not experiencing, enjoying and respecting other cultures along with their own, not anything. Sorry you live in such a bubble.

nobody is claiming that we are supirior to any race or people,
but from what i see around me here,number one reason for assymilation is marrying "odar".
beeing pround of your armenianity to keep your children Armenian while you are married to a Guatimalian is not enough,one has to make tremendous effort to preserve their chldren's identity ,I will admit that beeing both parents armenians doesnt neccesarily make the task automaticaly easy .
one can never be passive in this matters specially in diaspora.

When I was a 15 years old kid I used to fall in love with every beautifull girl I saw!!.I appreciate beauty like most of you here.
I remember my father telling me:"son dont confuse between love and marriage,they are completely differnt things"!!.I never realy understood what he meant.
But deep in myself I knew that i was destined to marry an Armenian women,couldnt imagine myself otherwise,couldnt see myself speaking other than my own language in myown house,couldnt imagine myself other than debating with my wife and children about our peoples problems and whereabouts,we praise and criticise Armenians as if we do to ourselves,without beeing imbarassed from each other ,I wanted that we both have the same national dreams and feelings.
Exactly 16 years ago I met my wife with a group of teachers we got aquainted and married within one month.we didnt even have the chance to know each others preferances.

And now after 16 years I am deeply in love with her as she is with me.

bottomline ladies and Gents,dont fool youselves ,you will never feel free if you are not married to your own kind, even if your aim is not even preserving your identity.

the choice you make can easily destruct a civilization or preserve it so dont rush take you time before making that crucial decision which will have a great impact both on you your children and you culture.

#38 Vigil

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 12:34 PM

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Edited by Vigil, 31 May 2004 - 04:44 AM.


#39 mx5

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 12:34 PM

QUOTE (loxxsqueen @ May 20 2004, 07:07 AM)
.  I AM proud to be an Armenian, but not nationalistic. 

nobody is claiming that we are supirior to any race or people,
but from what i see around me here,number one reason for assymilation is marrying "odar".
beeing pround of your armenianity to keep your children Armenian while you are married to a Guatimalian is not enough,one has to make tremendous effort to preserve their chldren's identity ,I will admit that beeing both parents armenians doesnt neccesarily make the task automaticaly easy .
one can never be passive in this matters specially in diaspora.

When I was a 15 years old kid I used to fall in love with every beautifull girl I saw!!.I appreciate beauty like most of you here.
I remember my father telling me:"son dont confuse between love and marriage,they are completely differnt things"!!.I never realy understood what he meant.
But deep in myself I knew that i was destined to marry an Armenian women,couldnt imagine myself otherwise,couldnt see myself speaking other than my own language in myown house,couldnt imagine myself other than debating with my wife and children about our peoples problems and whereabouts,we praise and criticise Armenians as if we do to ourselves,without beeing imbarassed from each other ,I wanted that we both have the same national dreams and feelings.
Exactly 16 years ago I met my wife with a group of teachers we got aquainted and married within one month.we didnt even have the chance to know each others preferances.

And now after 16 years I am deeply in love with her as she is with me.

bottomline ladies and Gents,dont fool youselves ,you will never feel free if you are not married to your own kind, even if your aim is not even preserving your identity.

the choice you make can easily destruct a civilization or preserve it so dont rush take you time before making that crucial decision which will have a great impact both on you your children and you culture.

#40 loxxsqueen

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Posted 20 May 2004 - 01:12 PM

Mx5, FYI, Being a nationalist by definition says that you think your own kind are better over others, giving them preference over others in any case.

When you were 15 yrs old, you didnt fall in love with every beautifyl girl you met, that was your hormones. And your father telling you dont confuse between love and marriage, exactly proves my point of Armenian marrying Armenian for the sake of it. You are truly LUCKY to have met someone and marry them in months time, and fall in love. That is NOT the norm.


And Vigil, to say that 'there is a concequence to every decision made in life' doesnt make sense. And for you to say that one has nothing to preserve because their kids are part Armenian (or whatever) and part something else is a horrific comment. Preserving LIFE is what the Armenian gentlemen who married non-Armenian will be doing. Are you telling him that his children's life will be of no value. You do you think you are?

Further, marrying non-Armenian does not prove that you love yourself as an Armenian any less. If you let other people justify who YOU are as an individual, you have some issues. One can teach there part Armenian kids about history, to speak Armenian, Read Armenian, eat Armenian and YES baptize them Armenian Orthodox. THATS how one can preserve the "Armenianess" of his or her child. And that child can take those things with them in life and using your word 'maintain' their Armenian heritage.

and just because you dont marry into your culture DOES not mean that you are not proud of who you are. .. you are ridiculous.

and how do you think our 4000 years of history came about. Through pure Armenians. Get Real.

Maybe YOU would lose your identity if you were to marry a non-Armenian, sounds like a phobia to me from all your comments. And yes, it takes two to procreate, but you dont lose 50% of your identity, how is that possible. What happens is a childs life is enriched by having an opportunity to grow up in a loving hope, with two well-rounded parents, who know who they , where they came from, who have common values and ideals, and will pass this on to their kids.

If one marries a non-Armenian, why wouldn't they try to perserve their culture through there kids, even being part Armenian. THe child WOULD BE BORN with Armenian blood. Just because its only half , are you saying the child has no right to learn about Armenian culture, when in they ARE Armenian. Again, who gives you the right to dictate who is Armenian and who is not.

And I do not live in the phobia stricken bubble you live in




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